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Now that Gerald Wallace is coming to Portland, let’s examine the deal. The Blazers lose longtime tough man, and fan favorite, Joel Pryzbilla along with up-and-comer Dante Cunningham, a pair of future first round picks, and the trade’s latest addition, Sean Marks. Portland is now on the hook for Wallace’s contract, which is a bit steep. He’ll get nearly $10.7 million next season and he has a player option to the tune of $11.4 million for the 2012-13 campaign.

Now a little about Wallace for those wanting to know about the new guy in town. A one-and-done player at the University of Alabama, Wallace entered the notoriously bad 2001 NBA Draft (Kwame Brown! Darius Miles! Raúl López!) and was selected 25th overall by the Sacramento Kings. In his three years in Sacramento, this was this lone highlight, and he was picked up by the Charlotte Bobcats in their initial expansion draft. He thrived in Charlotte as their starting small forward, thanks to his impressive all-around game and ability to cause sheer chaos whenever he steps on the courts. No fooling, Wallace’s game is pure recklessness and his past history of injuries (concussions, collapsed lungs, scurvy—okay, that last one was a lie) is proof of that. Most Charlotte fans see Wallace as the greatest player in their team’s brief (and lackluster) history.

Basically a stuntman in a basketball jersey, Wallace is not afraid to launch himself into the seats for a loose ball and make every single play look like this. As a player, he’s best in a mobile offense and unlike his time on the Bobcats, he won’t be relied on as the primary offensive option, or that one guy who has to score now that Stephen Jackson was just tossed from yet another again. Current Blazers assistant coach Bernie Bickerstaff used to coach Wallace in Charlotte, so the Blazers know what they are getting. It’s safe to say that Wallace will be the new fan favorite within minutes of stepping foot on the Rose Garden hardwood. Can’t wait.

Ezra Ace Caraeff is the former Music Editor for the Mercury, and spent nearly a third of his life working at the paper. More importantly, he is the owner of Olive, the Mercury’s unofficial office dog....

13 replies on “Gerald Wallace is the Newest Portland Trail Blazer”

  1. i give it roughly six weeks till he needs arthrospoctic knee surgery. this is fucking retarded. i guess the blazers have given up on having big men playing center.

  2. @BlackedOut There is a chance he’ll come back. He might be bought out from Charlotte and then he can resign with any team after a delay (30 days, I believe). ZydrUnas Ilgauskas did this last year with the Cavs. The Gorilla might return.

  3. @ROM Marks hurt is finger and is probably done. The team wants to get TJ Ford after Indiana buys him out. Portland is about to get MUCH smaller, but it’s better in the long run.

  4. NOOOOOO!

    Actually, I shouldn’t make fun of Marks. He was once a beautiful woman before the Goddess Athena turned him into a hideous monster.

    Godspeed, Sean.

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