Crap.
Crap.
  • Crap.

“We are about to enter the nuclear winter of the NBA”
—David Stern, NBA commissioner/man who says really dramatic things to freak out basketball fans.

The 2011-12 NBA season is (most likely) over. Oh great, another year where Greg Oden didn’t do a damn thing. This morning the NBA players rejected the owners’ last ditch (and totally unfair) labor offer, and have decided to dissolve their union and file an antitrust suit against the league itself. This decision means that the entire 2011-12 season is likely be axed. Okay, fine, there is still a small chance that they can talk it out and learn to love again (David Stern and Derek Fisher trust falls!), but sadly it’s looking more and more likely that today is the day the season died.

Yes, we all know the world is filled with other real issues—all those brave people downtown protesting the Kardashian divorce (What? I’ve been off this blog for awhile, I’m out of the loop.)—but the prospect of losing an entire basketball season is a pretty devastating. There are numerous reported local economic benefits to the franchise, and countless others (arena employees, front office staff, and people stupid enough to leave comfy day jobs and open a bar that would broadcast games on television) that will be affected as well. And frankly, the Blazers offer a nice respite from the monochromatic misery of yet another Portland winter. I don’t know what to do without them.

On the positive note, the Blazers finished the season undefeated with no major injuries. So there’s that.

Ezra Ace Caraeff is the former Music Editor for the Mercury, and spent nearly a third of his life working at the paper. More importantly, he is the owner of Olive, the Mercury’s unofficial office dog....

10 replies on “NBA Talks Fall Apart. All is Wrong in the World.”

  1. There are a couple up-sides to this.
    Hopefully I won’t have to see James face again till next season, and maybe, just maybe Oden will finally be 100% by that time.
    (a guy can dream, right?)

  3. On another positive note, my husband switched us to Direct TV which will save us an estimated $800 this year. I am now less concerned with losing Comcast Sportsnet.

  4. Ezra, I propose you market your bar to a far better demographic: drunks! Yes indeed! A good drunk can keep a bar in the black even through the darkest of winters. Just don’t let them keep a huge bar tab all at once and you’re set!

  8. I propose Ezra host weekly (nay, nightly?) interpretive dance reenactments of classic Blazer moments from the past at the OG.

    I humbly submit my services for I’ve been perfecting both my Sheed-throws-towel-at-Sabonis and Sheed-accosts-Donaghy-in-tunnel.

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