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For Portland Trail Blazers supporters familiar with terms like RLEC (Raef Lafrentz’s expiring contract), and salary dump (pretty self-explanatory), today is like Christmas morning. The NBA trade deadline ends tonight at midnight tomorrow at noon, and Portland has a golden ticket (RLEC) they are ready to cash in. But the question is, who does Portland send packing, and more importantly, what player(s) will the Blazers acquire?

The names being tossed around include: Amar’e Stoudemire (not gonna happen), Vince Carter (maybe if it came with a time machine to take him back to his younger days), Kirk Hinrich (meh), Qyntel Woods (just kidding), Luol Deng (yes please), Caron Butler (oh yes), Gerald Wallace (oh god, yes!), and tons more. This is like the NBA version of Brewster’s Millions, and Portland is playing the role of Montgomery Brewster. The only problem is that midnight cannot possibly come soon enough. I want a trade.

Now.

*** 2:30pm update: Blazers Edge is reporting that Ike Diogu is on his way to (most likely) Sacramento. More coming…

Ezra Ace Caraeff is the former Music Editor for the Mercury, and spent nearly a third of his life working at the paper. More importantly, he is the owner of Olive, the Mercury’s unofficial office dog....

9 replies on “Squeal! NBA Trade Deadline Looms!!”

  1. Don’t get too excited about Deng. He has regressed quite a bit since the playoff performance of a couple years ago. And he has an expensive long-term contract.

  2. Who do you want to go though? Besides Channing, RLEC, Sergio… I’m kind of a nervous wreck. Don’t say Travis or I’ll punch you and kick your pug.

  3. I don’t know, Cosmonaut. I think I would regress, too, if I were forced to play under Vinny Del Negro. Underneath someone who, you know, knows how to coach, I think Deng flourishes again.

  4. Caron Butler is clearly the at the head of this class. Give them RLEP and Señor Turnover and we’ll call it good. I’d accept the loss of Outlaw, too, if that’s what it takes.

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