I’m off to the mountains for a few days ( I KNOW, RIGHT? WHAT AM I? THIS GUY? JESUS CHRIST!), and you know what that means… NO INTERNET. I’m very interested to see what happens while I’m gone. Here are my predictions.
1) The internet shuts down and waits for me to get back.
2) Someone posts a video of their kitten doing something adorable and/or stupid.
3) Either a public or private figure does something ridiculous and/or shameful, but figures “Oh, what the hell. No one will ever find out, because there’s no technological advancement that will allow everyone in the world to see what I’ve done.” That person will be proven wrong.
4) Apes will take over, and when I return, you will be in a loin cloth being shoved into a rustic cage by a gorilla on horseback carrying a rifle. You look sexy in a loin cloth. LET’S DO IT!
And 5) this person will be crowned the next Lady Gaga, which is awesome, because I’m really sick of the Lady Gaga we have now.
See you in a week, INTERNET!
Just watch this video 5 times and it will hold you over until you can once again fall into the warm embrace of the internets… http://youtu.be/okh8cvOJbEo
Don’t forget another great tune of hers:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8WoyPEVRFo
Otherwise known as the super fantastic live Leslie & the LY’s http://www.leslieandthelys.com/
Does this mean blogtowners are going to have to endure a week without any Justin Bieber posts?
How do we get her to do a show in Portland?
I think option 3 is the most likely to occur.
6) I will be sleeping with a hot chimpanzee who thinks like Helena Bonham Carter. Oh wait that happened before you left town.
@ WM.™ STEVEN HUMPHREY– When they talk about the dangers of Cougars and Bears eating you food, these are not the same kind of cougars and bears that come to your parties in town.