Oregon resident Jeff Ellis was on an Alaskan Airlines flight when he was suddenly stung by a SCORPION! (Didn’t see that coming.) Here’s Jeff’s account of the mid-flight scorpion attack—which would be a whole lot more interesting if Samuel L. Jackson was telling it.

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

One reply on “I Want These Mothereffing Scorpions Off this Mothereffing Plane!”

  1. If that plane had made it to Alaska there would’ve been a horde of immense mutant Ice Age scorpions ravaging the “Last Frontier” within a few months. Too bad!

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