In this great remote (which Conan O’Brien legitimately excels at), Conan and super cute Dave Franco make profiles on Tinder, find a suitable match, and then travel together for their scheduled hook up in their van called, “Brown Lightning.” SO MUCH ADORABLE FUN.

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)