While I truly despise the song Ebony and Ivory, I barely even noticed it in this clip of shirtless Terry Crews (from Brooklyn Nine-Nine) and Jimmy Fallon* having a “nip-sync” competition where they make their pecs hop up and down in rhythm with the song. I DON’T KNOW WHY THEY’RE DOING THIS. But it is mesmerizing!

* How much do you think it would cost for me to rent Fallon’s body double?

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)