Sure, you SAY you love your best friend… but do you really? Think long and hard about that, and then watch the cast of the hilarious Workaholics (new season starts tomorrow on Comedy Central at 10 pm) sing the most amazingly emotional ballad to best friends you’ve ever seen. Then call your best friend, and tell him, “GODDAMMIT, I LOVE YOU, MAN!!!”

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)