Jimmy Kimmel’s “Celebrity Mean Tweets” segments are not only consistently hilarious, they play a valuable public service: Hopefully mean tweeters will watch this and say, “Hey, I really hurt that celebrity’s feelings… and I got on TV. LET’S DO IT AGAIN!!”

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)