Yesterday House Republicans finally came to the realization that they were fucking themselves out of a pretty sweet job by obstructing… you know… “the government,” and therefore decided to end the shutdown. HOWEVER! As Denis mentioned briefly in GMN, their stupid, selfish shenanigans drove a lot of people absolutely crazy in the process—including, apparently, the House stenographer who was captured on C-Span grabbing the mic, and screeching a rant about God and the Freemasons? Here’s what she said, via Gawker:

“He [God] will not be mocked,” the stenographer, apparently named Molly, yelled into the microphone as she was dragged off by security. “The greatest deception here is that this is not one nation under God. It never was. It would not have been. The Constitution would not have been written by Freemasons. They go against God. You cannot serve two masters. Praise be to God. Praise be to Jesus.”

Watch the video here, which is then followed by the audio (for reasons unknown). My favorite part is when you hear someone shushing her, “SHH! Molly! Shhhhhhh!!” He must be in on the Freemason conspiracy.

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

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