This will teach him for reaching underneath the seat!

I subscribe to a car sharing company. Yesterday after I parked and was gathering my stuff, I did the usual reach under seat. I pulled out one of those plastic clear christmas candy cane tubes, the kind usually filled with crappy generic m&m’s.

I can see there is something in it… but am not sure what, cash? Weed? I pounded it into my fist a couple times and gently pulled out a gross ass pair of….

What did I, Anonymous find in the plastic candy cane? (HINT: It wasn’t M&Ms.) To find out, read the rest of the submission here, and while you getting totally grossed out by the answer, don’t forget to drop off your own rant or confession in the I, Anonymous Blog—where you’ll never know what you’ll find inside a candy cane!

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Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)