Dear every bartender on the Oregon Coast, from Florence to Lincoln City who insists on sitting in plain sight behind the bar stuffing your face full of food while on shift. You know who you are. Greeting customers with your cheeks stuffed with that nacho or burger or whatever you are gorging on at the moment. You gross me the fuck out. And I’m sure it’s not just me. Did you take that little test and actually obtain a food handler’s or OLCC card? Unbelievable. So don’t act puzzled when I leave after one beer and leave little or no tip. I sure as hell don’t you want you handling my glassware or, god forbid, serving me food with those unwashed hands that just came from your mouth, handled cash, and then squeezed that lemon into a patron’s cocktail. I won’t even go into how you made me wait to cash out while you were on the patio or out front smoking with your regulars. The very idea of trash like you getting a higher mandated wage makes my head explode. Would YOU hire You?
Dear Every Bartender
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You should see some of the shit bartenders in Crescent City, CA do when they’re serving customers.
You also sound like a germaphobe.
Welcome to Portland, NEWBIE.
good name for a bar. The Every.
God I HOPE that every bartender on the coast gets a chance to read this. The laughs they’ll have at your impotent rage will be endless!
“Gah! I went to some small towns on the Oregon Coast and I’ll just tell you it is NOT like the Pearl, at all.”
The only respectable beach town for you is CB, only go there. Nowhere else. Just Cannon Beach. And don’t worry about the assholes behind you getting all uppity about your driving 54 mph, 25 in the curves. Remember ONLY CB 4 U!
Hansee: “did you spit in my water?”
Bartenders often don’t get lunch breaks, and they can’t leave the bar unattended. They need to eat food. Also, they likely wash their hands a lot because they have to touch snot rags and other treasures left by assholes like you.