Maggot Tea It wasn’t enough for the medical brainiacs over at OHSU to reintroduce the use of live leeches to help free blood flow to damaged arteries. (The “Ick Factor” of that procedure alone should have put Oregon on the map for all time.) But then along came Maggot Tea Bags. Scientific one-upmanship is an […]
John Dooley
Posted inIt Sure is a Scientific World
It Sure is a Scientific World
Mushroom High A letter from local highschool student Jonny Needlin asks, “Dear John Dooley, I want to take psychedelic mushrooms, but my cousin tells me my brain is not yet fully formed, and that I should wait before exposing my virgin gray-matter to psychotropic substances. What should I do?” Jonny, it’s always a pleasure when […]
Posted inIt Sure is a Scientific World
It Sure is a Scientific World
Brave New Male Odor Sniffing sweaty men makes women feel good! Or so says Charles J. Wysocki of the University of Pennsylvania. In a new study, Wysocki reveals how he swabbed male sweat drizzle onto the upper lips of female test subjects (without telling them what it was), and says the results proved that chicks […]
Posted inNews
Let’s Play… Release-A-Date!
Multnomah County’s “Early Release Program for Prisoners” Is Just in Time to Provide You With a Hot Date
Illustrations by Kathryn Rathke Are you tired of relying on singles bars, speed-dating services, and prevaricated personals to find potential mates? Isn’t it annoying relying on haphazard, “luck-of-the-draw” means of sifting through the masses looking for someone compatible with your interests (which undoubtedly include binge drinking, drug abuse, street racing, identity theft, and other felonious […]
Posted inNews
Small Town Dirt
Are Neighbors Conspiring To Trip-up Dwarf’s Fantasy Farm?
Matt Roloff is a fighter–or as he puts it, a “David in a Goliath world.” He’s the president of Little People of America (dedicated to assisting people faced with the challenges of dwarfism), he’s been a successful computer systems designer, and has even starred as an Ewok in Return of the Jedi. Now he’s a […]
Posted inIt Sure is a Scientific World
It Sure is a Scientific World!
Oyster Sex
Newsflash! The good folks at the Molluscan Broodstock Program have sex with everyone’s favorite pearl shitter, the OYSTER! Well, sort of. MBP is a selective breeding and genotyping program funded by the USDA to improve oyster production in the Northwest. Of all the fabled creatures of science, the oyster is rarely depicted as being a […]
Posted inIt Sure is a Scientific World
It Sure is a Scientific World
I Wish You Diarrhea
@Normal= @Normal=[S””,”Normal”] @$:I Wish You Diarrhea! We¹ve all heard how good it is to eat healthy foods, exercise, and have a few drinks every day. But the latest health findings just may coax you to squirt in your pants! What is the latest health-related scientific bombshell that¹s spewing forth from the mouths of the experts? […]
Posted inNews
Medium Rare
Hawaiian Psychic Channels the Dead (and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle!)
Dressed casually in a floral-patterned, blue and white T-shirt, with hands behind his head in relaxing repose, it would be impossible to guess that native Hawaiian Arthur Pacheco routinely talks to the dead. Surfing the same wave of pop psychics as John Edward, James Van Praagh and Sylvia Browne, Pacheco is considered by many to […]
Posted inIt Sure is a Scientific World
It Sure Is a Scientific World!
Z-Cardz-ZOW!
Is that a purple triceratops in my pocket? It sure is! I’ve also got an ostrich in there. They’re part of my Z-Cardz collection, and it’s swelling by the day. My collection, that is. Z-Cardz are tiny pocket puzzles that, upon completion, become 3-D models of tanks, hot rods, land animals, jets, birds, and even […]
Posted inUncategorized
Moonshine Of Mine
Local Man Defies Law to Brew Up His Own
“Moonshine?” Why, I do declare! Didn’t that go out with Daisy Duke’s button-down bloomers? Hell, Naw! Well, yeah, but… Hell Naw! First of all, you don’t need to have spare teeth stuck behind your ears with bubblegum, or go barefoot with your toenails removed, or have a stringy Rasputin beard tucked into your jug to […]
Posted inNews
Are Biosolids as Safe as They Say?
I believe it was the ancient philosopher Anonymous who coined the sagacious phrase, “Don’t shit where you eat.” That pearl of wisdom can easily be adjusted to reflect growing concerns over the use of human waste sludge (called biosolids) as fertilizer. Inasmuch as biosolids are praised as an inexpensive and effective fertilizer, only recently have […]
Posted inDestination Fun
GOING NOWHERE SLOW
GHOST TOWNING FOR DUMMIES
Caught up in the daily hustle and bustle of the city, sometimes you just have to get away. I suggest leaving urban comforts and go ghost towning, because soon, they won’t be there at all. What’s left is fading fast. For now, ghost towns can still be found all over the state, and most are […]