As you have undoubtedly heard, Portland has officially declared this week to be “JUSTIN BIEBER WEEK” throughout the city, in honor of his upcoming concert next Wednesday. Ahem. Excuse me for just a moment.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
Thank you. And just in time for Justin Bieber week, the Taiwanese media has bestowed upon the Bieb their greatest gift. They’ve made a CGI news report about him! Just like they did for Al Gore! Except instead of being depicted as a “crazed sex poodle,” this CGI report documents the rise of this young superstar and how “the internet” has turned against him. NOT THIS INTERNET, BABY! NEVER THIS INTERNET! Anyway, it’s hilarious, even though the character in this video looks NOTHING like Justin. (He’s supposed to look like a lesbian, Taiwan! C’mon!!)
Hat tips to Andrew!

Enough with the Justin Bieber already. We get it. You dig Justin Bieber… You’re turned on by Justin Bieber… You want to make sweet, sweet love to Justin Bieber, despite the fact that he’s a sixteen year old boy and you’re a sweaty old newspaper editor… It’s understood. Lay off it man, you’re starting to creep us all out. Yeesh…