Bedazzling your butt is clearly no weirder than vajazzling your vajajay, so who are we to get in the way when there’s money to be made? Introducing the Backtacular butt crack patch: Cyclists take note. Available here, starting at only $14.99! Via Buzzfeed.
Drugs
Posted inFood and Drink
Happy 4/20, You Stupid Pot Heads! (Now with Gravy)
Okay, so a lot of you pot heads got really mad at me for calling you pot heads. (JOIN THE SPIRITED CONVERSATION HERE!) In the meantime, here’s how I’m gonna make it up to you pot heads: By giving you pot heads something to stare at (other than the backs of your hands) for the […]
Posted inDrugs
Happy 4/20, You Stupid Pot Heads!
I don’t talk about it much because I live in Portland Oregon, but I KINDA DESPISE POT HEADS. Why? Here’s why: 1) Pot makes you really smelly. Like the ass of a skunk raised on goat’s milk.2) I like to hang around with people who are smarter than me, because it makes me smarter. Pot […]
Posted inMusic
Celebrate 4/20 with HannaH’s Field!
It’s April 20! That magical day when stoners across the nation celebrate by shifting slightly off of their mom’s couch. Well, we’ve rhapsodized about HannaH’s Field before, the Oregon-Connecticut band who swept the American Marijuana Music Awards with their video for “Puff Puff Give.” Yeah. Remember that? Well, they sent us their new song just […]
Posted inDrugs
Clownin’ Around at Cirque du Soleil’s KOOZA
Granted, the number six Trimet bus is hardly a mobile gathering of esteemed scholars, but even I was shocked when my seat neighbor loudly exclaimed that the newly erected Cirque du Soleil tent on the south waterfront was for “fumigation or some shit.” Sadly he was incorrect. (If he was right, just imagine the pile […]
Posted inDrugs
Good Morning, Hilarious Anesthesia Video!
MARK MY WORDS: This fall some network is going to produce a show about patients hopped up on anesthesia after getting their wisdom teeth taken out. Why? Because the result is ALWAYS bizarre and hilarious! Naturally the grand poobah of all anesthesia videos is the classic “David After Dentist,” but if you ask me, “Jesus […]
Posted inCats
Pisco the Surfing Alpaca
Meanwhile, in Peru: Fun for people, fun for animals? Or just fun for people? Via the Telegraph.
Posted inEvents
A Time for Whiskey, a Time for Amphetamines
That’s right, folks, it’s Johnny Cash’s birthday! Which means, of course, we all need to have Johnny Cash-themed parties, experience drug and alcohol induced bouts of hysteria/rage/dissipation, and then bounce back with healthy, reformed, spiritually awakened attitudes to conclude the evening. My friends and I hosted one of these parties in college with great success, […]
Posted inDrugs
A Very Seventies Christmas: Part II
Drugs! Yes, drugs. I only mention them because the ‘70’s would not have been the ‘70’s without cocaine, Quaaludes, amyl nitrate, and marijuana. The same goes for Christmas, really. Is there anything better than wallowing in the warm, limp embrace of a couple ‘ludes and staring at the lights on your tree while listening to […]
Posted inDrunk
A Very Seventies Christmas: Part I
Maybe it’s because I was born the ‘70’s. Maybe it’s because I’ve been consuming waaaaaay too much Welcome Back Kotter on the Hulu. Whatever the reason, it has become my opinion that the 1970’s reek of Christmas more than any other decade. Upon further reflection, I believe I must draw some sort of sick correlation […]
Posted inDrugs
Good News About Teenagers and Drugs
AP: Smoking marijuana is becoming even more popular among U.S. teens and they have cut down on smoking cigarettes, binge drinking and using methamphetamine, according to a federal survey released Monday…. The increase of teens smoking pot is partly because the national debate over medical use of marijuana can make the drug’s use seem safer […]
Posted inDrugs
Give a Hoot: Pot Pollutes.
This little post on the New West blog focuses on reports that gun-toting marijuana ranchers roam Southern Oregon’s woods (maybe true?) but I think the actually interesting point it brings up is that pot pollutes: In Oregon’s Grant County, manmade damns and chemical-laced pools were discovered along tributaries of the John Day River. I’ve come […]