Photo: Jessica Leeder/The Globe and Mail I’ve been known to watch an episode or two of Hell’s Kitchen. I’m not proud of it. But as the Bible says, “Let those who’ve never suffered bad television judgment throw the first remote.” The thing that captures my attention about Hell’s Kitchen is the manufactured extremity of the […]
Ethics
Posted inEthics
Puberty: Life’s Beautiful Mystery!
Hey everybody. I’d like to take just a minute to “rap” with our YOUNGER Blogtown readers. Yo, kids. Are you currently in PUBERTY? Well, I bet you’re pretty nervous aren’t you? And you should be nervous—because it’s horrifying. Blood squirts out of your vagina, and without warning your penis extends up to 25 times its […]
Posted inEthics
Okay, This is Awkward.
The first thing I’d like to say is this: I did not murder Danny Gans, and I did not have Danny Gans murdered. That being said, you may have noticed in the news today that Danny Gans—”musical impressionist” and the most popular act on the Vegas strip—died at the young age of 52 of mysterious […]
Posted inMovies & TV
“Something Weird’s Going on with That Mule. It’s Like it Has Superpowers or Something!”
I was going to do a whole into to this video and make a few easy jokes about how proud Kevin Sorbo and Ice-T must be of their new film Tommy and the Cool Mule, but I am fucking speechless. All I can do is to tell you to watch this immediately. It will change […]
Posted inPuppy
Talking Jesus Doll vs. Insane Athiest Puppy… WHO YA GOT?!?
I got an Easter basket full of flack for my recent I Love Television™ column in which I merely made the suggestion that Jesus should back the eff off of Easter, and get his own holiday. Oh, wait… he already has one, and it’s called CHRISTMAS.I’m sorry, but two holidays is just WAAAY too much […]
Posted inFood and Drink
Takeout Tipping
After the customers had gone, I went to clear the table and pick up the credit slip. I noticed that on top of the slip they had left a penny. I picked up the penny, thinking it was discarded spare change, only to find an aggressive dark slash in the space where a tip should […]
Posted inEthics
This Ought to Alleviate the Fears of the Paranoid Christian Right
I can’t bring myself to read the article. Do they blame the aligned-with-the-GOP, politicized, corrupt and co-opted Christian “movement” for the “The Decline and Fall of Christian America”? And does this mean no more pandering “Historical Jesus” cover stories?
Posted inFood and Drink
This Week’s Mercury Last Supper Food Section
What’s so funny about peace, vegans, and understanding? I don’t know what prompted me to taunt her with the sausage, but I’ll always regret it. She was my very good friend and co-worker who also happened to be a vegan. I must have somehow felt threatened by her dietary philosophy. Why else would I have […]
Posted inPuppy
Dog vs. Elephant: Who Ya Got?!
HA! Fooled you! You see, life isn’t about competition, it’s about building strong interpersonal relationships. It’s about taking someone’s trunk in your fuzzy white paw, looking into their eyes, and barking softly, “You’re cool with me, man.” If these two can do it… (sniff, sniff)… Then why can’t we? Why can’t we?
Posted inEthics
The Future of Journalism?
The Guardian UK launches Open Platform today which could CHANGE THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT. Or something. Open Platform, according to the website, is the suite of services that make it possible for our partners to build applications with the Guardian. We’ve opened up our platform so that everyone can benefit from our journalism, […]
Posted inEthics
Is it “Ethical” to Buy Girl Scout Cookies?
Yes, I know that I could probably Google this and find out the answer for myself, but… why ruin your fun? Here’s my question: I KNOW THAT THE BOY SCOUTS IS HISTORICALLY A HOMOPHOBIC ORGANIZATION—BUT DOES THIS INCLUDE THE GIRL SCOUTS, TOO? AND IF SO, DOES THIS MEAN I CAN’T BUY THEIR DELICIOUS COOKIES? According […]
Posted inEthics
French Spider-Man is a Menace to Hong Kong
Another Le Daily Bugle Exclusive Editorial from Monsieur J. Jonah Jameson In an unsurprising development, French Spider-Man has been up to his old illegal tricks again—but this time he’s taken his nefarious crimes to Hong Kong! As reported today in England’s Telegraph, French Spider-Man—who has been terrorizing Paris and the Champs-Élysées for years—has taken his […]