Letters

THE TRUTH? I CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH! TO THE EDITOR: As a news reporter who covered homicides, fatal house fires, fatal aircraft accidents, and other tragedies for nearly three decades, I am familiar with the spoken and unspoken language of persons at the scenes of these events. This is why I am quite certain that […]

KATIA, CUT THE MELODRAMA! WORD TO MS. DUNN: If you intend to write articles such as Hiphop’s Last Gasp [News, Katia Dunn, Sept. 6] get off of the News page and onto the nearest soapbox. (Which reminds me, Wm. Steven Humphrey’s No Blood, No Foul? [On My Soapbox, Sept. 6] was smashing). Is the OLCC […]

DRUNK… OR PERHAPS… STUPID?? TO THE MERCURY: I just wanted to let you guys in on the fact that in your last issue, you completely messed up the calendar [September Pull-Out Calendar, Aug 30]! How stupid do you have to be to notice that you put no 16th, 17th, or 18th, but you instead put […]

LIVE AND LET DIE TO THE MERCURY: You’re weaving a web of drivel and misinformation [“It Sure is a Scientific World,” John Dooley, August 16]. Incorrectly, Mr. Dooley whines about VHEMT (Voluntary Human Extinction Movement), “They want me to die. They want you to die too.” Does Dooley have his paranoid head up his ass […]

CHOOSE YOUR VICTIMS CAREFULLY TO THE MERCURY: Rich Quinn’s letter in the August 16 issue of the Mercury said there would have been little outcry if Derry Jackson had said “Muslim” or “Ukrainian.” Well, what if he had said white people? Oh, but you can’t serve a cynical, political purpose by damning the majority. And […]

CUTTING-EDGE ECLECTICONS, OR SORRY ASS PLANTS BY THE JIGGIDONS? DEAR MERCURY: I’m writing about your completely terrible coverage of hiphop. In your “new releases” listing for August 9, you give recommendations to the following artists, among others: Lisa “Left-Eye” Lopez, New Order, and Timbaland & Magoo. I don’t usually pay much attention to this part […]

TOP 10 REASONS TO LOVE THE MERCURY (AND JULIANNE) TO THE MERCURY: Top 10 reasons why I love the Mercury: • Julianne Shepherd. • Great cover art. • Julianne’s interview with Jello Biafra [Feature, Aug 2]. • Julianne Shepherd’s reviews, articles, and various brilliant contributions. • Visible and positive coverage of Nader and the Greens. […]

STOP YER DICKIN’ AROUND! TO THE EDITOR: I’ve noticed a few flaws in your most recent issue. First is Simon Gasken’s preview of the Real Pills/Ex-Models/Starve show at the Blackbird [“Up & Coming, ” July 26]. Are Mr. Gasken’s comments directed at any of the particular bands, or is it just a rant about garage […]

JEFFERSONIAN IDEALIST BEGS FOR A BIT OF HAMILTONIANISM DEAR MERCURY: Can you please add a modicum of sense to your tirades over the city’s proposed noise ordinance? Involving the Portland police in anything nowadays is really frightening–interestingly, Phil Busse [“On My Soapbox,” July 12] barely mentions this aspect of the ordinance–but elevating his desire to […]

LAP DANCE & TABLE DANCE: THERE IS A DIFFERENCE! HELLOOOOO JUSTIN: Read your review on Mary’s Strip Club [Theater, July 12] and I say, “Hell ya to that!” One down, 49 more to go… Kidding! I really appreciated the take. FYI, a lap dance is more of a body-slide booty-grind. A table dance is a […]

MMM… WE THINK SHE WAS BEING “IRONIC” DEAR MARY McDonald-LEWIS: [“Letters to the Editor,” June 28, in which Ms. McDonald-Lewis reminds the Mercury that the word “welch” is an oppressive term directed at Welsh people.] I am all for ending the use of terms created out of the idiocy of long-dead bigots. That would certainly […]

WHO IS THIS BEAUVINE HICKLEYDICKLEY? DEAR MERCURY: Just one question… Why is it that everytime Beau Hincklydickle [Beau Von Hinklywinkle] picks his nose in a public place, the Mercury feels inclined to forcibly “recommend” that its readership run out and pay expensive money to watch? I’ve come up with three possible explanations: The first is […]