So you’re smugly “car-free,” you say? Not “car-less,” I
noticed. What’s that? Could I pick you up on the way downtown?
Suuuuurrrre. You want to hitch a ride to Trader Joe’s? I
guess. The first time, I was happy to oblige, but it is getting
old. And it kind of flies in the face of being car-less—I mean
car-free—doesn’t it? Hey, gears-for-brains, did you know that an
innocent little trip down to Fox Tower for a movie costs me about $5 in
gas, maintenance, and depreciation? Sauvie Island? About $15. That is
why the IRS pays $0.505 per mile on vehicle use. As should you. Also
tiresome are the car-less faux friends who take a sudden interest in
being a Gorge hiking buddy come Saturday. I guess that Zipcar is a bit
rich, isn’t it? Oh right, that would be because it is a
car. And cars cost money, cheapskate! Pay
up!—Anonymous
I, Anonymous
Passive Driving
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You’ve never heard of Nancy Reagan, you stupid fuck? JUST SAY NO…
Man, do I understand this. When I had a car, every bicyclist I knew asked me for rides (while still maintaining that irritating, mounted-on-high-horse piety). Never offered gas money and usually acted like they were doing ME a favor.
I know both types of carless folks- urban hitchhikers and real bikers. The former drive me nuts.
They just say they choose to be “car-free” so they aren’t embarrassed to say they either
a) can’t afford a car and it’s upkeep
or
b) Can’t afford to fix their car.
I am honest about my predicament…I just don’t have a car but i sure do want one:)
Ha Ha! So true, those dorks. I think it’s funny how the hipper than thou set emulates the same kind of exclusive behavior as those they rebel against ie. religion, the rich. Same shithead, different day!