The elderly bum was sweating and mumbling, obviously plagued with
mental illness. He asked the two of you for change, to which you pricks
responded, “Sure, if you get down and do pushups.” While he’s doing
pushups, you’re laughing in your Ed Hardy T-shirts and designer jeans.
After one of you tosses him a dollar, you douchebags gloat as he walks
away with his head hung low. Well, you fuckhead taints, I’ve placed a
gypsy curse on you. Your ugliness will begin to seep out, starting with
your penises. You’ll contract an untreatable STD. The cottage cheese
that oozes out of your dicks will be incredibly painful and no one will
want anything to do with your chunky sperm and leaky anuses. This will
leave you with no love in your life. When you crawl into a dark corner
to die alone, no one will remember you. After your slow, painful
deaths, you’ll be sent to a place where you lose all hope and joy. But
I guess you’re already used to that, huh? Because what I witnessed was
soulless and evil. Nothing I could have said or done would have changed
you pieces of garbage, so I’ve been forced to lay this curse on you.
You’ll rot in your own shit.

—Anonymous

9 replies on “I, Anonymous”

  1. Dear Anonymous Gypsy Witness Loser,

    Passive-aggressive much? Next time you see an elderly, mentally-challenged human being being victimized, TAKE A STAND TO STOP IT!

    “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” ~ Edmund Burke

  2. Dear real_life

    I’m all for taking a stand on issues that need to be addressed. Sometimes, though, seeing something horrible takes me by such surprise at the actual moment, that I can’t properly form a sentence, much less articulate what really needs to be said.

    I’ve been known to toss some ‘gypsy’ out in the world when the moment has passed. My favorite is ‘may your karma come back to you tenfold.’ It’s great, cause all the evil they spew into the world comes back to them, but if they change their ways for the better, that comes back to them also. At least that’s what my gypsy brain hopes happens.

  3. hey the guy made a dollar, I doubt he was complaining. I guess it would have been wrong if they made him felate a cocker spaniel but as it is who cares…

  4. People with ordinary human empathy care. Jerks took advantage of his desperation to get him to cooperate in their assault on his dignity. There’s nothing right about that.

  5. I’m with real_life here. Casting your gypsy curse is kind of like buying carbon offset credits. You can go on feeling all righteous and good about yourself without actually having to do the right thing. Grow a pair, you wimp.

  6. This is so phony. What a weird poverty porn fantasy someone has dreamt up. All its missing is “Please, sir, can I have some more?”

  7. Gypsy curse? Are you fn for real? There are no “energies” or “qi” or magic invisible friends to right the wrongs of this world. and anyone who would stand by while an obviously ill old man suffered humiliation [& perhaps pain], did nothing to stop it, and then muttered an incantation later is – and I mean this from the depths of my heart – NOT A GOOD PERSON. Even if they think they are. Even if they use the most flowery language to form their little after-the-fact negative prayer.

    And even if there were some sort of afterlife, or some cosmic being/group of beings, who could affect the future existence of those involved in this disgusting little scenario, informing the gods/faeries/elves after the fact so some future events can be rejiggered to balance the cosmos is not the same thing as doing something to interrupt the awful act.

    If you see an injustice and you don’t do anything to stop it [if not directly, at least call a cop] you are not a nice little gypsy. You’re a freakin wuss.

  8. You are going let a couple of probable hipsters do this and not intervene? Any minor action would likely amend their behavior. Or you could try offering them a real job, generally that sends that sends them running. But do get involved next time-Econoline sounds like he’s geared toward this sort of behavior

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