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Behold! The trailer for The Sorcerer’s Apprentice, in which Nicolas Cage plays a wizard a magician himself a sorcerer who does goofy-ass magic and talks all stupid. And yes, film nerds, this movie is apparently based on that one part in Fantasia in which Mickey Mouse tries to go all Harry Potter but fucks it up and gets beaten up by some mops or drowns or something? I don’t know, Fantasia is like NyQuil: The Movie, so like I can remember how that part of it ended. Anyway, The Sorcerer’s Apprentice will be just like that one scene in Fantasia, except without Mickey Mouse and with Nicolas Cage! Or something.

Also, Disney? It’s not too late to do some reshoots so you can have Nicolas Cage getting attacked by bees in this thing. Because if there’s one thing people just can’t fucking get enough of, it’s seeing Nicolas Cage getting attacked by bees.

Via FilmDrunk.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=h5SiTjlu48w%26hl%3Den_US%26fs%3D1%26rel%3D0

With honor and distinction, Erik Henriksen served as the executive editor of the Portland Mercury from 2004 to 2020. He can now be found at henriksenactual.com.

4 replies on “FACT: Everything Nicolas Cage Does Is Hilarious.”

  1. If you add having his face cut off and replaced by John Travolta’s which starts on fire as soon as he gets on his motorcycle and THEN being attacked by bees on the world trade center, I’m SO there!

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