GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! I’m not a prophet or a stone-aged man, just a mortal with potential of a superman. I’m living on. LET’S GO TO PRESS.

It’s the 10th day of the Oregon standoff with those “militia patriot” domestic terrorists, and things just keep getting weirder. More armed “patriots” are coming in to Harney County in an attempt to get Bundy’s gang to give up their idiotic takeover. Meanwhile even more unwanted help is arriving in the form of out-of-county legislators, as well as armed dummies from the “Pacific Patriots Network” (sounds like the most terrible TV network ever) who are there to ostensibly protect both the militants AND the protesters. DEAR GOD. This is getting hilarious(ly stupid).

Yesterday was the 2016 “No Pants MAX Ride.” You are welcome to any feelings you have about that subject.

The Blazers take down the Oklahoma City Thunder 115-110, and our own Aris Wales was on hand to watch the victory. Check out his recap of the game here!

Today is a legitimate day to mourn: The amazing, beautiful, eternally talented David Bowie has died at the age of 69, following an 18 month battle with cancer. Here are but a few of the tributes pouring in from all over the globe.

In last night’s Golden Globes, the big winners were The Revenant, The Martian, Leo DiCaprio, and Jennifer Lawrence. Now you may return to mourning David Bowie, which is the only thing worth thinking about this morning.

ICYMI, Mexican drug lord Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzmán was arrested after a crazy six-hour chase involving sewers, helicopters, a carjacking, and a sex motel. (There’s also a very weird side note to this story about Guzmán’s Rolling Stone interview with actor Sean Penn.)

In NYC, four New York teens have been arrested in connection with the alleged gang rape of an 18-year-old Brooklyn woman. A fifth suspect is still at large.

Volkswagen CEO Matthias Müller has issued a public apology for the faked emissions tests perpetrated by his company.

Today in “Stupid Things Donald Trump Says”: The Donald takes on the equally stupid sport of football!

No one won the $900 million Powerball grand prize on Saturday, which means Wednesday’s drawing could hop up to $1.3 billion.

Here’s an interesting problem: Producers of the Dan Savage-created upcoming sitcom The Real O’Neals wanted a gay man for one of their leads, but couldn’t ask if he was gay because of discrimination laws designed to protect the LGBT community. Check out how the problem was solved.

Now let’s look at that WEATHER outside: Scattered showers for the entire week with highs in the low-to-mid 40s.

And finally in memoriam, here’s David Bowie’s classic and gorgeous song, “Absolute Beginners.” Fare thee well, old friend.

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

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