Both of these losermobiles were spotted in Southeast this week. I really can’t decide which innovative idiot is the more laughable:

The person who built their own gas powered bicycle?
cebf/1238629165-gas_powered_bike.jpg

Or the SUV-driving Steelers fan with the bad boy vanity license plate asking for a ticket?
3e37/1238629209-douche_car.jpg

Sarah Shay Mirk reported on transportation, sex and gender issues, and politics at the Mercury from 2008-2013. They have gone on to make many things, including countless comics and several books.

25 replies on “Douchebag vs. Douchebag”

  1. I don’t know if the irony is intentional, but that white bronco looks like the famous AC bronco from the OJ chase.

    I’m Alf damnit.

  4. I don’t exactly see what is wrong with either of these vehicles. One is a moped, the other is an SUV. And it’s the type of SUV that can actually go off-roading. And why is the SUV asking for a ticket?

    Let go of your internalized guilt and take a look around. You’re misisng the point and going after the wrong targets.

  5. Maybe the guilt the Bronco-owner is feeling is guilt over loving too hard…. which resulted in unwanted babies that now must need a lot of protection.

    Graham, I think it’s pretty obvious that the vehicle is parked more than 18 inches from the curb. Ticket time!

  8. You’re trying to shoot fish in a barrel, but you can’t even find anything outrageous to lampoon. You give us someone’s DIY bike / moped project and a pretty ho-hum Ford Bronco and try to skewer it with an anti-combustion-engine / anti-SUV message? god, what a bore. I see more worthy targets every day.

    But don’t let up on your message, man: driving is dumb and evil. Always. You’re so very above all that ignorant redneck stuff– except when you’re at the pawn shop posing with guns, right? ‘Cause that’s like, ironic. Or something.

  10. that gas powered bicycle looks pretty sweet… as for the bronco, his old lady probably made him put that up, i’m sure he gets enough shit as it is from his buddies.

  11. Chunty, you sure read an awful lot into those four sentences up there.

    “GU1LTY” is a pretty awful license plate, but it would be better on a cherry red Corvette. It seems out of place on the Bronco. The bike, on the other hand, does indeed look sweet.

  12. yeah, but so many in those sentences:

    “losermobiles”
    “innovative idiot”
    “laughable”
    “SUV”

    The gas powered bike conversions are nothing new, and I saw a hipster riding one down the trendy bits of Alberta on Monday– so maybe they’re the new fixie?

    And the truck– why hate a real, old-school SUV when there are so many fake-ass luxury truck abominations pretty much everywhere you look? Oh– but it’s got that vanity plate and the Baby On Board sign? Still lame: It could have spoilers. It could have a billion stupid running lights. It could have a picture of a howling wolf draped in american flags airbrushed on the tailgate.

    Yawn, Sarah. Fucking yawn. Find something better to hate on.

    Don’t get me wrong: I appreciate a good weird vehicle story. There’s just so much more interesting shit out there! And I really don’t understand the need to bash this stuff either– “losermobile” etc. Too many people fly the “Keep Portland Weird” flag on their boring ass Subarus. Do you really want “weird”? Or is that just another way of saying you want yuppie monoculture?

  16. Yay! 5 points. Since you don’t give bonus points out for comments, I don’t really know what kind of rating is happening, but I’ll assume that 5 points is the highest amount possible to get.

  17. A tragic tale of what could have been:

    “Dude, check out my new bronco!”

    “Rock on, brother, that’s just like that one from that OJ thing”

    “I know! Isn’t it rad? I was thinking of getting vanity plates that said “guilty,” because… Well, it hardly needs to be explained.”

    “I don’t know man, you’d better think twice about that… You seem to not be considering the likelihood that some humorless skank might see said combination and think you somewhat of a douchebag.”

    “Ah! Sage advice, my good friend. Once again your Solomon-like wisdom has helped me to avoid severe emotional hardship. I am forever in your debt. By the way, are you still trying to sell your moped?”

  18. Oh noes, a home-brew moped.

    Sarah, you often write well and it’s a pleasure when you’re firing on all cylinders. I don’t know what’s happened lately, but you seem to be checking actual critical thought at the door. If you want to RAGE[!], at least know what you’re talking about so you don’t look stupid. Please bring back the good writer with interesting thoughts.

  19. It’s funny how at least at the beginning of these comments that none of you ‘get it’.

    White Bronco, Like what OJ drove, hence the Guilty plates, as in OJ’s guilty. duh

    it’s like you posters are all 20 or something…..

    didn’t know they sold baby on board stuff still.
    back when this was all the rage I had a postcard for this where their was a baby nailed to a board and the baby on board sign. late 80’s jr. high.

Comments are closed.