JESUS CHRIST. I get into work today on time for once and all ready to do shit and then the internet foils my plans by making me feel like I’m going insane.

First there’s this. It weirds me out that the least authentic thing about this is fake Sam Elliott’s fake mustache. I mean, isn’t adult entertainment the one industry where you should be able to find a naturally robust mustache?

Moving on. I know Steve mentioned it already, but COUNTERPOINT. Here’s this goddamn thing:

I kinda like what Warming Glow said in the aptly titled post The Simpsons, 1989-2010:

The most important point to take away here is that the writers of this show believe that you a) enjoy or can at least tolerate the musical stylings of Kesha [sic], b) appreciate it when characters who have been developed over the course of twenty-plus years are used as puppets, and c) don’t need jokes, only familiar faces. Otto is being shown on my television. Whoa, now Comic Book Guy is being shown on my television! I am familiar with both of those characters! And they are singing a song (I like songs)!

And then there’s… whatever the fuck this is. I can’t… I don’t… fuck. FUCK. Words… words not enough. The good stuff starts at 1:30.

I don’t… I don’t know what’s happening, you guys. I don’t feel very good. This blog post is kind of a cry for help.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=fX8_vtk46ws%26hl%3Den_US%26fs%3D1%26rel%3D0%26hd%3D1

With honor and distinction, Erik Henriksen served as the executive editor of the Portland Mercury from 2004 to 2020. He can now be found at henriksenactual.com.

10 replies on “This Is Me, Slowly Going Insane.”

  3. I’m so sick of people refusing to let themselves be entertained by the shows they have tuned in to watch (in one way or another).

    IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT DON’T FUCKING WATCH IT.

    Note: this logic does not extend to commenters nitpicking with the Mercury. That’s just such a bad analogy, and I’m offended you would even potentially go there.

  8. I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again – if you’re going to make Lebowski porn, you call it LOGJAMMIN.

    The Tyra thing is the kind of shit that should be happening on The Office, but isn’t, because that show is so off the rails I half expect them to start inserting Family Guy style flashbacks.

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