Eggnog: You're wrong. It's gross.
Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas Is You" is the best holiday song: Wrong. It's "Jingle Bell Rock" as sung by the cast of Mean Girls.
Hipster Santa: I'll allow it. (Why should Santa have to conform to your outdated stereotypes?)
Christmas cards: Wrong. No one wants to open their mailbox and see your face.
Ugly Sweaters: You were wrong then, you are wrong now.
"Jack Frost Nipping at Your Nose": Jack Frost better get the fuck away from my nose.
Spending time with family during the holidays: In what universe is this not a wrong idea?
Chanukah: Wrong. It's spelled "Hanukkah," old-timer.
Advent calendars: Please. You don't even know what an "advent" is.
SHE'S NOT CLOSE TO STOPPING. READ MORE HERE>>>
