Anonymous

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] To the people who were throwing firecrackers in Ankeny alley on Saturday night, I’d like to say fuck you. A young man was murdered by gunfire in that spot not 6 months ago. You suburban rich […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] Why won’t the local news media tell the whole story of this dumpster fire? In a nutshell this is how the citizens of Portland are going to be on the hook for close to 800 million […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] My company, a well-known premier outdoor sports gear brand, just announced then quarterly profits and high-level actions and events. A slew of execs from the parent company came to our HQ for meetings. We know this […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] Maybe 4 out of the hundreds of men I have met in my life have not been assholes. Like why are y’all assholes? Chill on your egos and just be decent human beings!! Like from childhood […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] I wrote to Congress: Please oppose almost everything Robert Kennedy Jr. does and support efforts to remove him from office. Of concern lately: censoring positive covid vaccine reports, only sporadic issuance of the important public health […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] Our Oregon inferiority complex always leads us to instigate a national search to fill critical government positions. This is great for the business that manage recruitment, but it’s terrible for Oregon. The “highly qualified candidate” is […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] Maybe you even like it. I feel like we’re going to be good friends.—Anonymous

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] We have been hoodwinked by a milquetoast keebler elf who declares the city to be in a Renaissance while we are suffering an affordability crisis. No skill nepo baby, the fact he was elected proves racism […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] No one has tagged my fence in the 13 years I’ve lived here. Until you, shithead. Did you realize that the wood fence was stained, not painted? So I can’t paint over your ugly scrawl unless […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] Fuck you, fuck your recovery tightness and your ability to skip the conversation, fuck your gossip. I need my own space. I need my own trust. I need you to loosen the fuck up. Fuck you […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] I would like to still be here next year. Live long enough to complete a few more goals and work on my relationship with my wife and kids. I don’t want to give up and find […]

[Got an anonymous confession or rant you just have to share with the world? Submit it to I, Anonymous HERE!—eds] They will survive without your intervention. I swear it to you.  Has your own shoe ever been untied and you haven’t noticed? Honestly, if you’re above the age of, say, eight, this is just unlikely. But […]