Update: Now with footage from the game. Apparently kicking dudes in the crotch is a valid boxing maneuver. Who knew? When you think of Kim Kardashian odds are good that you’re thinking of her ass, and not boxing videogames. *Cue dramatic orchestral swell*Prepare to have your paradigms shifted. Electronic Arts has announced that Kim and […]
Earnest "Nex" Cavalli
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Who Put Star Wars in My Soulcalibur?!
The revered Soulcalibur series returns for another go-around—and this time, Yoda and Darth Vader crash the party.
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Let’s Talk About Wrath
The NDA on the next World of Warcraft expansion has dissolved, and I can finally tell you all about it. Wrath of the Lich King is currently in an invite-only beta, but since I once pulled a splinter from Mike Morhaime’s paw I’m one of the lucky few who gets to explore the new content […]
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Google Aids Japanese Zombie Invasion
Have you ever wanted to lead a group of zombie attack survivors through the wilds of Laurelhurst Park? Too damn bad. The Last Guy doesn’t do Portland, Oregon (yet). What it does do though, is give PlayStation 3 owners a chance to lead people to safety among hordes of zombies, insects and monsters on a […]
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The Bird Is A Jesus Metaphor (Probably)
Would you believe me if I said this picture is the least bizarre thing about Soulcalibur IV? Between the inclusion of Darth “Anakin “James “This is CNN” Earl Jones” Skywalker” Vader and Yoda to the fact that they spell the title — which is obviously two words — as a single, bizarre compound noun/verb-jective thing, […]
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Dark Void: Rockets, Robots and Neo-Futurism
After Capcom insisted I watch a video of a game about herding sheep (some of whom poop without warning), I was a little let down. Street Fighter IV was cool, but if all the company had was fecophiliac livestock and aged fighting games, I was ready to leave E3 thoroughly disappointed. And then, I saw […]
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Vampire Nazis vs. Rocket-Launching Werewolves
The Sheer Radness of Operation Darkness
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Kubrick & Kojima
Comparing Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots to other games is an exercise in futility—not only because it’s such a fantastic work of art, but because most of it simply isn’t a game. The vast majority of your time in MSG4, the latest entry in creator Hideo Kojima’s beloved series, isn’t spent playing […]
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100 Percent Id
Profound hypothesis time, kiddies: Ninja Gaiden II is the ultimate digital expression of purely concentrated id wrung from the most lovingly crafted fantasies of every 14-year-old boy who has ever been picked on for being scrawny, funny looking, or generally undesirable to post-pubescent ladies. Ryu Hayabusa, Ninja Gaiden II‘s titular ninja, is everything a lonely […]
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Back to the Arcade
The last two decades have seen the almost total collapse of the traditional American arcade. Sure, you’ll still find places like Ground Kontrol that exist thanks to the two-pronged assault of nostalgia and the intoxicating power of alcohol, but the smoke-filled, neon-lit rooms of the ’80s are as rare as unicorns, and not nearly as […]
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More speed! More racing!
Nintendo’s greatest strength has always been the company’s ever-expanding roster of colorful mascots: From their humble beginnings riding the coattails of a certain Italian plumber to last month’s release of Super Smash Bros. Melee, the constant repackaging of Nintendo’s characters has proven consistently charming, and more importantly, extremely lucrative. With the just-released Mario Kart Wii, […]
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A One-Way Ticket to Liberty City
Grand Theft Auto IV is amazing. Period. Exclamation point. Smiley face. Fans of the previous games in the series don’t need me to tell them that. They’re all too busy playing the game already. For those of you who are on the fence about the purchase (or somehow missed hearing about one of the most […]