Wait. That sounded weird. What I meant was, here’s a bunch of teenage girls doing a surprisingly elaborate swede of Predator, and I’ll be damned if it’s not just as entertaining as Predators. It’s pretty funny and impressive all around, except for maybe the fact that I don’t remember the real Predator wearing sweatpants. Ladies, […]
Girls Only!
Posted inGirls Only!
It’s a Planned Parenthood Party! And an Abortion Ban! Boo.
Though it’s in the Busy Week section, somehow I failed to alert everyone I know about the awesome event going on tonight: Planned Parenthood’s Block Party! Reasons this is awesome:1) Anti-Planned Parenthood protesters have picketed the women’s health clinic for setting up their headquarters in NE Portland, alleging that their location means Planned Parenthood wants […]
Posted inGirls Only!
REALLY Don’t Want Kids? New Permanent Birth Control Adiana Now Offered by Planned Parenthood
God, that headline is long. I’m sorry, I tried. Anyway, Planned Parenthood has just announced that they will now be offering Adiana at their Southeast clinic, a permanent, “98.4% effective” form of female contraception. According to the press release, it’s a fast, pain-free process (I can find nothing on the internet to disagree with these […]
Posted inGirls Only!
Today in Appropriate Penis Mutilation
According to Gizmodo, an inventor in South Africa has come up with a product that should put quite a damper on the nation’s raping industry. It’s a condom… worn by a woman… that has sharp razors inside… that tears the fuck out of any penis that tries to rape her. INTRIGUED? Read on… The inventor, […]
Posted inGirls Only!
What Women Really Want
I’ll admit it: I’m completely bamboozled when it comes to buying presents for women. I usually end up getting them Dr. Pepper Lip Smackers, or a six pack of white granny panties. However! Now that I’ve seen this video, I know what to get even the most disaffected gal— A PAINTBALL GUN. Because apparently, women […]
Posted inGirls Only!
Boy Covers Lady Gaga, Girls Swoon
Parents, consider locking up your pubescent daughters. This little boy is on the loose, turning Lady Gaga songs into panty droppers. (Is nothing sacred?!) Keep a close eye on the army of girls in the background. My favorite is the girl to the left who plays it cool by wavering ambiguously between falling asleep and […]
Posted inGirls Only!
Good Luck with your “Victory Over Porn,” Ladies!
It’s nice to see the NYT acknowledge that women also “consume pornography,” as the saying goes (a saying that makes porn sound like so many cakes with edible photos printed on them), but too bad it’s in a long article about—blah blah blah—sex addiction and guilt-ridden Christians. It was the final session for the women […]
Posted inGirls Only!
Woman Rushed to Hospital with Extreme Case of Osmond Vaginitis
According to Britain’s The Mirror, a woman was rushed to the hospital complaining of extreme pain in her cootie. When doctors examined her they found a rolled up poster of Donnie Osmond inside her vagina. Now normally, I’d call “bullshit” on a story like this… except that you can probably guess where I store my […]
Posted inGirls Only!
Exercising Your Lady Bits
So I’m looking deep into the crystal ball dangling from this woman’s vagina, and I see your future. And in this future, you have a very powerful vagina indeed. My only question: Isn’t she afraid her teeth will cut the string? (That was a “vagina dentata” joke. Nevermind.) via
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Bridgetown: Testosterone at the Tanker
I got a late start to last night’s Bridgetown Comedy Fest, so I went straight to the Tanker for the fun, open-mic-ish Comedy Cavalcade. Basically it’s comedians trying to make a room full of other comedians laugh. Sometimes it works (Brody Stevens!), sometimes not so much. There was a lot of testosterone flying around the […]
Posted inPolitics
Oklahoma Hates Women
It never ends: The Oklahoma Senate approved several bills Monday that opponents say would make it more difficult or uncomfortable for women to get abortions, including one that would require women seeking the procedures early in their pregnancies to undergo an invasive form of ultrasound…. One of the laws headed to the governor would require […]