1. The first twenty yoghurt-covered pretzels are delicious. You can’t imagine eating anything else again, ever. But the very next yoghurt-covered pretzel—the 21st yoghurt-covered pretzel—is utterly revolting. You can’t imagine eating another one again, ever. 2. Can ten Chinese tourists give themselves whores’ baths in an airport men’s room with only three sinks? Yes, they […]
Misc.
Posted inMisc.
20 Fish Facts You May Not Know
Does not approve of these facts, but probably doesn’t mind the publicity. In honor of the new Portland Aquarium opening tomorrow, I thought you would enjoy some fun facts about the sea creatures of the world. All of these are personally researched and confirmed by renowned… me. I’m not an official marine biologist per se, […]
Posted inMisc.
The Big Question: Should I Feel Guilty About Dream Cheating?
[Fake editor’s note: Alex has a B.A. in philosophy that he hasn’t been using very much. To make his parents feel like they didn’t waste $100k, he’s going to occasionally answer big philosophical questions for us in a way that would make academics and educated people cringe. -Alex (in the 3rd person)] The other night […]
Posted inMisc.
A Return To Positivity: 5 Things I Actually Liked In the Last Week
We can all agree everything I’ve written in this blog has been funny. That’s easy enough. But there has been some concern that it’s all a bit too negative. “What do you actually like?” “What do you care about?” “What can you come out in support of?” These are questions people ask in the comments, […]
Posted inMisc.
“I’m Not Modeling”
Here’s one way to preemptively strike against attacks on your DIY Facebook modeling shots: Buzzfeed A couple more cuties after the break. Buzzfeed Buzzfeed
Posted inMisc.
Someone in Georgia Will Do Anything For You
I try my best to keep my business dealings local but this craigslist ad from Atlanta, GA has some pretty great deals in it. travisdoesanything@gmail.com My name is Travis Broyles and I will do whatever* you want me to do for less money than whoever you are paying to do it now. Below is a […]
Posted inMisc.
A Duck That Looks Like Marilyn Monroe
Last month I blogged about Michelle Williams as Marilyn Monroe in the new movie My Week With Marilyn. The general consensus was that you all thought she looked horrible—and well, kinda dead. Fine. I think she looks gorgeous, but whatever. Maybe you’d prefer this duck, instead. So what do you say, Blogtown? In the upcoming […]
Posted inMisc.
Feelin’ Lucky Friday Concerts
Crystal Ballroom—The New Pornographers, The Dodos, Imaad Wasif, 8 pm, $23-25, all agesDante’s—Swingin’ Utters, The Cute Lepers, My Life in Black & White, 9 pm, $12-14 Doug Fir—The Mynabirds, Celilo, Sean Flinn & The Royal We, The Physical Hearts, 9 pm, $8 Fernhill Park—The Quick & Easy Boys, 6:30 pm, free, all ages Hollywood Theatre—Gulliver’s […]
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Now Hiring: Netflix Customer Service Representative
It’s a scary world. When I graduated college, I walked off the stage an into a crowd of friends, recent graduates, who were still looking for work. But there have to be jobs somewhere…. And there are, and all you have to do is sell out a little bit. If you’re up for something mindless, […]
Posted inTheater & Performance
BroadArts Yard Sale on Now
If you’re in the neighborhood, it might be worth it to stumble over to a yard sale/benefit going down at BroadArts, now through the evening, especially if you are in the market for specialty items like a portable stage, say, or a freezer vendor cart. It’s going down at 2006 NE 50th, and you can […]
Posted inMisc.
Agony-Fueled Euphoria
I recently took a tumble that involved a staircase and a complete lack of grace which resulted in a “severe sprain” on both sides of my ankle, a space boot/cast thing, crutches and some much needed Percocet. YES! I generally avoid prescription drugs, instead opting for whatever hippie bullshit DIY remedies I can find on […]
Posted inMisc.
Tsunami Advisory Issued for Oregon Coast
A huge earthquake (8.8 magnitude) rocked Chile this morning, resulting in a tsunami that is threatening the entire Pacific rim including the Oregon coast. From the O: Experts warned that a tsunami could strike anywhere in the Pacific, and Hawaii could face its largest waves since 1964 starting at 11:19 a.m. (4:19 p.m. EST, 2119 […]