Tien Hong 6749 NE Sandy Blvd, 281-1247 Tien Hong is sort of like smack. Once you put the first slithery, salt-and-pepper squid in your mouth, you’ll be hooked. In fact, my friends and I don’t even refer to Tien by its name, but merely as “salt-and-pepper squid.” This appetizer is made up of big pieces […]
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The Basement Pub
The Basement Pub 1028 SE 12th, 231-6068 With the way things are in Portland restaurants lately, a new bar means the next new-wave zucchini martini and an overpriced plate of fusion food. But if that’s what you’re expecting from The Basement, expect to be disappointed. For starters, you go to The Basement to drink beer, […]
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Chameleon
Chameleon
2000 NE 40th, 460-2682 At first glance, the interior of the Chameleon seems like a cross between a jungle habitat and restaurant, but as the sun sets the plant life and white linen blend into a less confusing ambiance. Volkswagen-size bouquets of sexy, fresh, purple orchids are balanced with mile-high tabletop candelabras, painting a scene […]
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Self-Hell
Analysis for People on the Go
Did My Neighbor Steal the Federal Surplus? As many of you may have heard, the federal surplus vanished last week. Where did it go? Whodunit? By all accounts it was locked up tight in Fort Knox. Then: Poof! Nothing. The government has asked that all right-thinking Americans scrutinize their neighbors for signs of suspicious behavior. […]
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No Fish, Go Fish
No Fish, Go Fish 634 N Killingsworth, 285-2751 There’s a certain heartbreaking charm about restaurants that are built with total sincerity–you can just tell that every decision has been sweated over, down to which kind of organic rosemary tastes better, or if six-grain bread is more complementary to the Caesar salad than nine-grain. The people […]
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Flying Elephants
Flying Elephants 812 SW Park Ave. 546-3166 Is there anything better than the taste of salty, fresh mozzarella accompanied by a crisp pinot gris? Don’t you just LOVE biscotti? Aren’t you CRAZY about J. Crew? Don’t you just hate people who snicker during Literary Arts lectures? Then you’ve probably already been to Flying Elephants, the […]
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DRUNK AGAIN!
Get Liquored Up With Our Second Annual Drinking Issue
• BAR-CHETYPES! A Sociological Overview of Barflys, Lotharios, the Unemployed, and Other Fine Folks Who Frequent Our Favorite Place in the World–the Bar by John Dooley, Katia Dunn, Wm. Steven Humphrey, Julianne Shepherd and Katie Shimer • ONE NIGHT DRINKING The winning entry in our "Crap, I’m a Drunk!" essay contest. by Christiaan Taylor • […]
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Bella Faccia Pizzeria
Bella Faccia Pizzeria 2934 NE Alberta, 282-0600 Pizza can, and probably always will be, problematic. It’s odd that such an inherently simple dish can be so well-loved, yet so rarely satisfying. After all, at the end of the day, a pizza is just some bread, tomato sauce and cheese–there are only finite ways in which […]
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Bar-chetypes!
A Sociological Overview of Barflys, Lotharios, the Unemployed, and Other Fine Folks Who Frequent Our Favorite Place in the World–the Bar
A ponderous question: Why are “bars” so unlike other business establishments? And why are the people you see in “bars” so very frightening and unlike anyone you’ve seen anywhere else (save the Greyhound bus station)? In order to rub salve on these concerns, the Mercury has set out to document and classify several bar archetypes–or […]
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One Night Drinking
[Congrats to Christiaan Taylor for winning our “Crap, I’m a Drunk!” essay contest. Though he met with tough competition from other entrants–including someone who threw flowerpots at her neighbor, and a woman who accidentally used Compound W instead of anal lube–Christiaan nevertheless walks away with the grand prize of a box of light bulbs and […]
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Are We Happy Yet?
YOUR CLIP-‘N’-SAVE GUIDE TO PORTLAND’S HAPPIEST HAPPY HOURS
It’s true, being broke sucks, but not as much as having your arm mangled in a piece of farm equipment–at least that’s our motto here at the Portland Mercury. And with that mantra in mind, we decided to come up with some positives about being a poor, penniless slob. Unfortunately, we couldn’t think of any […]
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Self-Hell
Am I a Clone?
All this debate over human cloning has led to some understandable hand wringing among those prone to identity crises. How much of who you are is determined by your DNA? Are you replaceable? And, if you are a clone, do you have super powers? Sorry, no. Still, it could be fun. Think you might be […]