Moonstruck Chocolate 526 NW 23rd, 542-3400 When I was 19, six friends and I crammed into my five-seat 1983 Toyota Corolla and drove from Portland to San Francisco in one day. Being the shortest one in the group, I got relegated to the hatchback, where I lay smashed between backpacks and Graphix bongs for about […]
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Cafร Lena
Cafรฉ Lena 2239 SE Hawthorne, 238-7087 To celebrate the 10th anniversary of this “restaurant for all the senses,” Café Lena has a revamped menu, introducing a “four course feast.” Serving in courses implies leisure and indulgence–the entrée shouldn’t arrive before the salad is finished, before the soup bowl is off the table. By dessert, customers […]
The Pink Feather
The Pink Feather 14154 SE Division, 761-2030 When you’re sitting around with $6.79 to your name, and you’re so sick of watching your roommate play Crazy Taxi you could puke, escape to The Pink Feather. Like an oasis in the bleak, stripmall desert between Portland and Gresham, it’s the sort of divey restaurant I crave. […]
People on the Go
Am I a Globetrotter? Let’s face it, there are travelers and then there are “bad” travelers. Some of us wander around the world looking for adventure. Some of us wander around our apartments looking for that bong we had just a minute ago. Do you have what it takes to be an international jetsetter, or […]
New York Vinny’s
New York Vinny’s Corner of 23rd Ave and Lovejoy I was planning to review the Good Samaritan Hospital cafeteria, until I witnessed the following disturbing scene: Approaching the 23rd Avenue entrance, a wild-haired half-naked man covered with electrodes suddenly came bursting through the doors. A small mob of nurses were in hot pursuit, screaming, “STOP […]
Mint
Mint 816 N Russell St, 284-5518 Two weeks ago, I had my first meal at Mint, the latest upscale dining spot in North Portland. That night the waiter bent over backwards and into pretzels to please us; but then came the second visit. The service was abysmal; about half-way through dessert (after we were twice […]
SELF HELL
Am I Financially Responsible? Recently, we’ve been hearing a lot about how the looming global recession will make the Depression look like the Moulin Rouge. All this yammering has made many of us examine our own fiscal conservatism. What shape will you be in when capitalism collapses? Take the simple quiz and find out. Good […]
Cafร Castanga
Cafรฉ Castanga 1752 SE Hawthorne, 231-7373 When I was in college, my friends and I would spend all our money on drugs, beer, and text books. Since we couldn’t afford to eat, we’d do something called “scrounging,” waiting at the end of the cafeteria line to eat people’s leftovers: soggy fries, vinegar-soaked lettuce and cabbage, […]
Twenty-Nine Cent Hamburger
Twenty-nine cents for a hamburger? A person could feed a nation! A thirty-nine-cent cheeseburger? It’s insane! Sundays and Wednesdays. I couldn’t wait for these days to come around. Holding 60 cents in my hand, two quarters and a dime, standing in line, knowing exactly what to order. For years I lived almost next door to […]
Ah’m Hown-gray! (Translation: “I’m Hungry.”)
Compiled by Wm. Steven Humphrey, Phil Busse, Julianne Shepherd, Katia Dunn, Quinn Viladas, Katie Shimer, Jessica Troiano, Monica Drake, and Louise Ross Low blood sugar is setting in, and you’re looking at the love of your life as if their head was a pork chop. The question arrives: “Where do you want to eat?” And […]
MUST…EAT…FOOD!
THE YEAR OF EATING DANGEROUSLY Sharing an Eating Disorder with My Best Friend by Katia Dunn THE NEW SPRING LINE OF LIQUOR A Lush’s Guide to the New and Unusual by Wm. Steven Humphrey and Quinn Viladas SWEETS FOR THE SWEET Manipulation through Licorice by Kathleen Wilson SUCKIN’ THE BONE Chicken Necks with a Friend […]
PAL’S SHANTY TAVERN
PAL’S SHANTY TAVERN 4630 NE Sandy Blvd, 288-973 Jim, who I barely knew, called to tell me he was broke, and to ask if I would buy him lunch. I drove over, picked him up, and drove us both to Pal’s Shanty. “This is an okay place,” he said. I agreed. “Portland’s got a lot […]
