Okay. Here’s what we know about the following Japanese potato chip commercial. 1) It is a Japanese potato chip commercial. I think. 2) It is about a little boy with a broken heart, who is cheered up by the most frightening walking dog you will ever witness in your life. 3) Japan is fucked. In […]
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Posted inArtsy
Adventures in Three-Demensional Perception
Remember that movie When A Stranger Calls Back that was on TV a lot in the early ’90s? The one where the guy paints himself to blend in with a brick wall? And then he opens his eyes? And then you had nightmares? A generation of therapists pretty much owe their car payments to this […]
Posted inArtsy
What a Cute L’il Duce
Even dressed as some of the most horrific dictators in modern history, my simple lady brain looks at these photos and goes, “CUTE! CUTE! GO MAKE ONE.” haaretz Scandinavian artist Nina Maria Kleivan’s “Potency” depicts her infant daughter as everyone from Idi Amin to Adolf Hitler. “We all have evil within us,” says Kleivan. “Even […]
Posted inFashion
H&M Hysteria in Toulouse, France
As fat, lazy, ignorant Americans with no style or taste whatsoever, we are taught to regard the French as the epitome of cultured refinement. They know to value quality over quantity, to only buy the very best one can afford, to practice discretion, and… to act like a bunch of shrieking savages the minute the […]
Posted inPuppy
Is Bestiality Fashionable Yet?
I guess this is old news in internetland but it’s new to my virgin eyes. Jezebel posted a couple of months ago about Canadian boutique SSENSE’s creepy photo series, “Puppy Love.” NSFW? There’s an awesome diatribe from one of SSENSE’s commenters about “simple and corrupt minded people” not understanding the “story” of these shots, but […]
Posted in?!?!?
Where Stolen Guns and Vespas Are Reincarnated
What happens to all the stolen objects that never find their way home again? Purloined bikes, car stereos, coin collections and guns pile up in the police property room, waiting for an owner to claim them. Evidence from trials piles up there, too. Right now, there are 329 found bikes hanging in the Portland police […]
Posted in?!?!?
Seen Today in PDX
Alien cultures expressly disobeying the wishes of landowners on NE Rodney and Ivy: Soo… WTF is that thing? And what kind of alien dumped it there?
Posted inMusic
Is the OLCC Pulling the Crystal Ballroom’s Liquor License?
According to this Fox 12 report, the shadowy cabal that is the OLCC has been “considering pulling the liquor license of Portland’s famous Crystal Ballroom.” This move would severely jeopardize the future of the long-running downtown institution that splits their showspace between mixed ages, yet still clearly relies on the income that comes with serving […]
Posted inMusic
You Are Doing it Wrong
While we have a fair amount of sympathy for new bands unclear of the complex nature of media relations, I’m not sure if this local band gets a pass for their poorly-spelled request for press coverage. Then again, our company vans do need a good washing… Hello; I would like to promote my bands upcoming […]
Posted inSports
Ap-hockey-lypse Now Redux
Hey, remember this? Time to re-up, motherfuckers! The polar bear is back and he’s sending a flaming hockey puck up your poophole! Fuck you, Earth! Long live hockey! You’re welcome.
Posted in?!?!?
At Dirty, No Means No (At Least, According to the Sign)
While it’s easy to take swipes at Dirty for being Portland’s very own Jersey Shore bar, I was intrigued by the sheer amount of signage currently on display in their front window. Especially the numerous “No Means No” signs. While we all know what that term means—thanks to this video—is that sign referring to behavior […]
Posted inTheater & Performance
Win Tickets to XANADU!
I have a pair of tickets for the Broadway touring production of XANADU, tomorrow night at the Keller. I’ve never seen Xanadu, and the Wikipedia entry makes NO SENSE to me (“Unbeknownst to Sonny, Kira is one of nine mysterious and beautiful women who literally sprang to life from a local mural in town near […]