Have you heard of Yeลilçam, the Turkish Hollywood? For three decades from the ’50s to the ’70s Yeลilçam was thriving, producing relatively big-budget films made locally for a Turkish audience. Then, in the ’80s television became more prevalent, the rise of the VCR changed distributors’ priorities and things looked bad for Turkey’s homegrown cinema. By […]
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Posted inVideo Games
Human Centipede: The Video Game
When I had the pleasure and honor of reviewing internet meme/gross-out film The Human Centipede a few months ago I remember thinking, “This will make a great video game.” I also remember thinking, “If I close my eyes and plug my ears the bad man onscreen can’t graft my ass to someone’s mouth.” Turns out […]
Posted in?!?!?
Announcement: I Am Now the Britishest Person on Staff
With Matt Davis having left the Portland Mercury editorial department, no doubt you readers are a little concerned about what the future will hold. Yes, the Englishman’s departure has left a gaping hole. But I’d like to assure you that it is a hole I intend to fill. HERETOFORE, I’d like to announce that I […]
Posted inComedy
Eight Pairs of Fishy Balls
Problems? I got ’em. As previously mentioned, Tuesdays at the Mercury are the opposite of this. As an intern I have no real deadlines to be concerned with, and Tuesdays are generally spent cowering in the break room with Olive. Cuddling with an adorable pug and surfing the internet? Who would complain? Well, the internet […]
Posted inNews
Name That Prisoner!
Here’s a weird one for ya. The Feds are looking for help identifying this man, who stole the identity of a dead Ohio 3-year-old in 1996 and was eventually hired as an Oregon Liquor Control Commission investigator using that name, Jason Evers. He just resigned from the job after being accused of falsifying a passport […]
Posted inLuv
They Will Make Matt Davis Their Ottoman
As mentioned earlier, Matt Davis is leaving the Mercury and his going away party is happening tonight at Club 21. (You should come!) To accompany Steve’s heart-wrenching ballads, I have invited our old friends, Peer Pressure, to treat Matt like their ottoman. I really hope Matt can appreciate being treated like an ottoman because there […]
Posted inSex
The Pocket Altar Boy
I was in NYC last week—for reasons I won’t go into—and dropped by the SoHo branch of Babeland, the Seattle-spawned, continent-straddling sex-toy empire. A member of Babeland’s knowledgeable staff, the lovely and talented Pam, was excited to introduce me to a new and very popular sex toy: The Sqweel. The Sqweel isn’t just giving copy […]
Posted inMedia
“Being Hated Pays My Bills”: An Exclusive Interview with Spencer Pratt
This Friday Matt “The Law” Lindland, Olympic wrestler and former Republican nominee for the House of Representatives, will be facing off in the Rose Garden against “King” Kevin Casey. Casey is an up-and-coming fighter in the MMA (mixed martial arts) who earned a brown belt under Brazilian jiu-jitsu legend, Rickson Gracie. Exuding extreme intensity over […]
Posted in?!?!?
Grow Rice in Your Bra. Duh.
Why is it that I’m always hearing about hardworking artists struggling to get funding for their projects, and yet in Japan it seems like anyone who has even a stupid, really really stupid idea for a gag has no apparent problem executing it with enough dough to throw a fake press conference and hire a […]
Posted inMovies & TV
If You Really Like Nick Cage…
… then you’ll really love this! And now that you’ve taken that all in, it seems appropriate to quote Mercury Film Editor Erik Henriksen at this juncture. I predict this will be re-edited time and time again to show Cage watching clips from Ghost Rider, Bad Lieutenant, Wicker Man, and (fingers crossed) the trailer for […]
Posted inCats
Cat Named After Twilight Character Attacks Family
Thank you thank you thank you to Skanner news editor LisaLoving for this tweet: Which led to this story accompanied by this photo: I read through the whole story about the cat named after a Twilight character who one day flips her shit and attacks her human family, and the main question it raised for […]