It was I who took your money, but I think you already know that. I saw you drop your shit as I was skating by, so I stopped to help and to my surprise, there's a fat $20 on the ground with all your other stuff. As I helped you pick it up, this fool palmed and kept it for himself, old school. When I skated away, I could've sworn I heard you yell at me, but I couldn't be sure and I didn't dare look back. Once I drank down your twenty, the thought of you knowing it was me made me laugh my ass off. For some reason, the idea of me, a grown man, stealing some kid's lunch money was the funniest thing ever. Oh, I know you'll never read this, and I also know that some spoiled kid with a $20 bill in his backpack will likely get repaid, but I just had to put it out there in the universe for me to bask in the reflected glory. Those beers were just a tad bit more flavorful, knowing who paid for them. Thanks, kid...