In the seventeen years I have been hitting Sauvie's and going to the naked beach, I have really never had a bad experience. Puppies and kids frolicking about, bouncing body parts playing volleyball, swimming and fun, and all naked. Naked doesn't equal sex, and the people at this beach are aware of that. Imagine my disgust, and those of my beach neighbors, at having to watch you fuck. Imagine my disgust at watching you jack off your boyfriend's flaccid penis. It's not about sex at the naked beach; get a clue. No one is into that, except maybe the few perverts who think they have a chance of getting laid after seeing your display. Thanks for ruining fifteen minutes of my day.
To the Jerks on Collin's Beach on the Fourth
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