Dan Savage

My wife and I are a lesbian married couple in Chicago. We are also proud moms to our wonderful, dynamic 17-year-old trans son. “Michael” is a great kid, and we have always enjoyed a close relationship. It has recently come to light that he is engaging in penetrative sex with men he meets on a […]

1) Would you be willing to share my list of proposed gender-free pronouns with your readers, listeners, and followers? I’ve enclosed a graph listing them that details how they should be used. They are very liberating. Sorry, but I’m unwilling to share your list of new pronouns with my readers, listeners, and followers, as there […]

I’m a male in my late 60’s with what I think is an unusual problem. My wife of almost 40 years and I have a good sex life and it’s gotten better since the kids moved out. Every two or three days, I give my wife a neck and deep gluteal massage and then she […]

My husband and I have been together fifteen years and been through pretty much all of the ups and downs sexually that a monogamous relationship offers. Two years ago, my husband was in an accident and broke his back. The accident resulted in some mild-to-moderate nerve damage to his legs and a newfound case of […]

My boobs began to get bigger — apropos of nothing — in my early thirties. A lot bigger. No weight gain, they just started growing and didn’t stop. I hated it. I’m very active, and they were heavy and miserable and got in the way. So, I had a breast reduction and had never been […]

I’m a 45-year-old cis woman. I’ve been married to a cis man for almost twenty years. About a year and a half ago, I made out with a woman at a party, and everything clicked. I realized something was missing in my life, and I started exploring my attraction to women with my husband’s blessing. […]

What’s the sexiest holiday food to eat off someone’s body? While food can be sensuous, you don’t eat food off someone’s body unless you’re fucking or about to fuck… and fucking on a full stomach is uncomfortable, which is why I’m always urging people to #FuckFirst” on Valentine’s Day (and their wedding days, birthdays, anniversaries), […]

Dear Readers: I’m off for Thanksgiving. I was to tempted to re-run this column again — which has the single best Thanksgiving-related question that has ever appeared in an advice column — but I re-ran that column last year. So, instead I’m re-upping a column that appeared just before Thanksgiving in 2016. — Dan I’m […]

I might be falling in love with my husband’s identical twin brother. My husband and I have been in a traditional monogamous cishet straight marriage for twelve years. It wasn’t until the last few years that I started catching feelings for my brother-in-law, who is also married. I first started to notice my BIL in […]

Dear Readers: Well, fuck. Reading a sex-advice column at a time like this — to say nothing of writing a sex-advice column at a time like this — might seem a little pointless. But I’ve lived long enough to know that seemingly pointless distractions, small comforts, and guilty pleasures have the power to sustain us […]

1. This debate is raging again, Dan, and we need you to issue a ruling: Do straight women belong in gay bars? Some (straight women, gay bars), not all (straight women, gay bars).  2. Why do men keep ghosting me after sex? I’m a 25-year-old woman. No clue. You could’ve had a string of bad […]

I am a bisexual cis woman in my forties. My boyfriend is a straight cis man in his thirties. I had limited experience prior to our relationship. That being said, it hasn’t stopped my boyfriend from providing all the pleasure I can imagine for the most part. There is just one thing I want to […]