One Day at a Time

MONDAY, JANUARY 16 Bringing the gift of gab, it’s One Day at a Time with the latest tongue-waggy tales from Hollyweird! Let’s go to press: The mysterious courtship of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt continued this week, when Brad successfully filed to have his name plastered onto Angelina’s adopted kids. According to E! Online, Jolie […]

MONDAY, JANUARY 9 Yay! Only a couple of weeks ago, teen screen queen Lindsay Lohan had practically dropped off the gossip radar, but now she’s back—and with a VENGEANCE. As already reported in One Day, Lindsay successfully completed the following tasks last week: (1) checked into a hospital after suffering a massive asthma attack, (2) […]

MONDAY, JANUARY 2 Though winter is here, baby batter is still in the air—in particular, the baby batter of the world’s most perfect genetic specimen, Brad Pitt. The naughty tongues of Hollyweird are in full “wag” mode over recent reports that a Pitt/Jolie wedding is right around the corner, to be quickly followed by a […]

MONDAY, DECEMBER 26 It’s the day after Christmas, and did you get what you wanted? US, NEITHER. In fact, according to the wagging tongues of Hollyweird, something very near and dear to our hearts has been taken away, which is to say, NUDE PHOTOS OF BRAD PITT. According to the New York Post, Pitt pitched […]

2005: “TROUBLE IN PARADISE” If three words can sum up celebrity relationships in 2005, it would be “Trouble in Paradise.” Check these out, the rockiest relationship stories of the past year!—Ann Romano MONDAY, JANUARY 10 The marriage of Tinseltown royalty Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston is now officially in the shit-pile. Frankly speaking, we blame […]

MONDAY, DECEMBER 12 R.I.P potty-mouthed genius Richard Pryor, who died of a heart attack over the weekend, after suffering from MS for almost 20 years. According to his wife, Jennifer Lee Pryor, “He did not suffer. He died quickly. At the end, there was a smile on his face.” His humor will be remembered as […]

MONDAY, DECEMBER 5 Look out, world! Global warming is melting the polar ice cap, which means there’s a tsunami of gossip comin’ straight from Hollyweird! Our first article of business: Is Britney calling it “Splitney”? According to the waggy tongues of the tabs, former pop idol Britney Spears is this close to calling it quits […]

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 28 Here’s your latest gab from One Day at a Time—or as it’s more commonly known, “the column designed to ruin Tom Cruise’s life.” Upon hearing our startling revelation last week that Tom Cruise had purchased a very expensive sonogram machine so he could spy on the wriggling fetus in Katie Holmes’ belly, […]

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 21 Whoo! Whooo! Look out Portland, here comes the One Day Gossip Train—and its caboose is full of wagging tongues spewing gossipy gab direct from Hollyweird! Note to Christina Aguilera: In a battle with Britney Spears, YOU CAN NEVER WIN. Even though the marriage of Christina to new hubby Jordan Bratman was the […]

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 14 Here’s a headline we’ve only dreamed of reading, but it’s true: “Paris Hilton Attacked by Monkey!” According to Femalefirst.com, the socialite/TV/porn star was viciously attacked by her own pet monkey while shopping for lingerie. That’s right: former Chihuahua pal Tinkerbell was given the heave-ho months ago, and her replacement, a younger, skinnier […]

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 7 If you take nothing else with you from this week’s column, please remember the following life lesson: This is Paris Hilton’s world—you just live in it. You see, everything in the universe is somehow connected to Paris Hilton, as will be proven in the following blurps of gossip. NEWS BLURP! Paris Hilton’s […]

MONDAY, OCTOBER 31 Hope you brought your appetite, because One Day at a Time is here with a Chinese-style buffet of juicy gossip (no MSG)! NEWS FLASH! Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie almost mauled to death by a grizzly; bear later apologizes for failing to finish the job to our satisfaction. According to the National […]