FIRST! I went to see the special “screaming teenage girls only” screening of Justin Bieber: Never Say Never in 3-Buttfucking-D, Buttfuckers last night (I told you I was a master of disguise!), and you can now read my astonishingly even-handed review right here! SECOND! Reviews so far for Beeb’s movie? MOSTLY POSITIVE! (Is that the […]
Bieber Fever
Posted inBieber Fever
Justin Bieber’s Here… You Can Die Now, Ozzy.
Did you catch that almost indecipherable blink-and-you’d-miss-it Justin Bieber commercial during yesterday’s Super Bowl? I HATED IT, YO! Mostly because they were trying to cram WAY too much into a 30 second spot. Here’s the far more understandable minute-long version. Oh, and that weirdo pervert at the end? That’s Bieber himself in a clever (but […]
Posted inBieber Fever
Justin Bieber Switches Bodies with Jon Stewart: WHO GOT THE BETTER DEAL??
In his continuing press juggernaut to promote his new movie Never Say Never—in 3D, Buttfuckers!!!—Justin Bieber stopped by The Daily Show yesterday to switch bodies with Jon Stewart. Unfortunately Stewart returns WAY too quickly to retrieve his body, and naturally the show went quickly downhill after that. It was awesome while it lasted, though! Watch. […]
Posted inTV
Beavis and Butthead to Return
The latest sign that ’90s nostalgia overload is just around the corner: MTV has announced the return of Beavis & Butthead. Well, to be fair, that honor was placed in the capable hands of the cast of Skins and Justin Bieber: “Solid day in NYC,” Canadian pop sensation and “Never Say Never” star Justin Bieber […]
Posted inBieber Fever
Like, Justin Bieber Really Likes “Like”
Okay, get a pencil and paper, and answer to the following question: During an average 11 minute interview on Jay Leno, how many times do you think Justin Bieber says the word, “like.” Write down your answer, and watch the video! So how close were you? Like, AWESOME! Bonus question: How many more posts are […]
Posted inBieber Fever
Dear Justin Bieber: You Can’t Make Me Hate You!
First, an email from a Blogtown reader and my response: Dear Blogtown Writing Staff:Please, Shut the fuck up about Justin Bieber already.-Anonymous Dear Anonymous:Thanks for writing! I’ll take your request under consideration.…………Okay, I’ve considered your request, and the answer is “no.” But again, thanks for taking time to write. yer pal,Wm. Steven HumphreyEditor Besides, how […]
Posted inDrunk
Get Drunk—the Justin Bieber Way!
Well… I guess I know how I’m gonna get fucked up this weekend. via People Note to Mercury office: I won’t be in on Monday.
Posted inBieber Fever
Good Afternoon, Justin Bieber!
If you’re like me, you’re pissed as hell that Justin Bieber isn’t on TV every week (or every day of every week for that matter)—but ALL THAT’S ABOUT TO CHANGE. (At least in regards to next week.) Bieber will appear on [David] Letterman’s show not once but twice next week. On Monday, Jan. 31, he’ll […]
Posted inBieber Fever
Today in Justin Bieber
Get ready to buy your tickets to L.A.—Justin Bieber is planning on opening up a store in posh outdoor shopping center The Grove! From LA Weekly: The main draw at the Bieber store, said to be opening later this year… is Justin Bieber-branded lollipops. Because what you really want is to have your not-yet-teenage daughter […]
Posted inCats
Oooohkay… I Guess Some Cats Just Don’t Like Justin Bieber
Sure, I’ll admit that his later singles aren’t as strong as his early ones… and yeah, his so-called professed Christianity is boring and annoying. But c’mon, foreign cat! Justin Bieber isn’t all that bad! Guys! Only SEVEN more entries until we hit “THE 100TH BIEBER FEVER BLOGTOWN POST!!” Excited.
Posted inBieber Fever
Good Afternoon, Justin Bieber!
via The Sun NOBODY PANIC!!! In the appropriately titled article “Badass Bieber”—stop laughing, you guys—The Sun reveals that Justin Bieber’s totes attractive shiner is actually just MAKEUP. And not the kind he sometimes wears. This is makeup for his television return to CSI, where he reprises his role as troubled teen Jason McCann—and if he […]
Posted inMusic
Confidential to Wm.™ Steven Humphrey
ATTENTION, BLOGTOWN READERS: If your name is not Wm.™ Steven Humphrey, you don’t need to read this blog post. Hey Steve! How’s it cookin’? Remember 2008? When your discovery of Yelle provoked you to say you would listen to no other music than French disco? Remember that? I sure do. Good times, good times. Then […]