While “hipsters”—or whatever it is you think “hipsters” are—consistently claim the top spot in the ongoing “Portland’s Most Loathed” competition, parents and their kids have been coming in a close second. Here’s a rant sensitively titled, “Do You Still Wipe Their Ass, Too?” Hey parents who take their kids to the public pool/swim lessons, your […]
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The I, Anonymous Blog Quote o’ the Day!
Someone over on the I, Anonymous Blog (where polls show that the people love polls) has their questionably-placed finger on the pulse of Blogtown with the post “Time for a Poll.” Steven Humphrey is:a. On Vacationb. On “Vacation”c. Stuck in a Mexican… Actually, screw that… let’s play this game for real:
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What Are Your Questions About This Police Ruler?
On Monday afternoon, the Portland Police Bureau offered up its most-detailed account yet of Portland’s first deadly police shooting of the year. We learned the name of the man who cops say came at two officers with a knife (Christopher Ryan Healy, 36, of Pennsylvania). And we got a glimpse at the “double-bladed knife, 10 […]
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The I, Anonymous Blog Quote o’ the Day!
Some digs on a newspaper we’ve never heard of popped up over on the I, Anonymous blog: “Willamette Weakly.” Hmm, doesn’t ring a bell. How about advice on how to move up in the world? I want to dine at the restaurants that 1%ers go to every night at least once in a blue moon. […]
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The I, Anonymous Blog Quote o’ the Day!
There is a very valid question over on the I, Anonymous blog: “What Is This? Footloose?,” in which the writer was told to stop dancing at the Decemberists show. Poor Anonymous felt just like the stifled high-stepper Kevin Bacon in 1984’s Footloose. i haven’t ever seen that fucking movie with kevin bacon (shut it, who […]
Posted inEvent
The 10-Year Anniversary of Quizzy!
A city that loves its pubs thus loves its pub quizzes. A lucky few in Portland are able to solely support themselves through the hosting of quiz activities, and one of these rare persons is Roy Smallwood of Quizzy. Smallwood’s duty is to distinguish Quizzy from the competing quizzes (most of which he contends are […]
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The I, Anonymous Blog Quote of the Day!
Guys! Why are you making things so COMPLICATED for this person?? I just wanna fuck, is that so hard? I don’t want “cheap,” I want some type of connection, but that connection will definitely include fucking. I want you to come over and fuck me without any bullshit. And yeah, I’d love it if you […]
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The I, Anonymous Blog Quote of the Day: Oh, Yoo-hoo!
This person is really mad at his roommate… and maybe for good reason? Remember how I had to piss so bad and you wouldn’t stop the fucking car because you were in a hurry to meet up with some internet ho, but you were so kind as to give me your empty Yoo-Hoo bottle? Guess […]
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The I, Anonymous Blog Quote of the Day!
Do you wear a chain wallet? This person thinks that, maybe, you shouldn’t be wearing a chain wallet! It’s Portland Oregon and the year is 2015. Most of you scuzzy fucks who STILL rock this absurd fashion abortion, are the types with zero denaro to begin with (rock-a-billys, hawthorne hippie-sters, meth-headed comb-boilers, weekend biker dudes). […]
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The I, Anonymous Blog Quote of the Day!
FINALLY! Some helpful tips for all those clueless guys on OkCupid: Stop being a bunch of fucking creepers. Just because you see my profile and find me attractive, does not mean: I find you attractive. You have to email and ask stupid questions (“Whoa, wait. Why do you want to learn to play the banjo?” […]
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The I, Anonymous Blog Quote of the Day!
MOTHER-IN-LAWS. They… are… the… WORST. Amirite? Yes? No? Well, at least this I, Anonymous Blog submission agrees with me! You have come in between my wife and I. Our life is going along fine. New born little munchkin, money coming in, the birds are shining the sun is chirping. These are the years a man […]
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The I, Anonymous Blog Quote of the Day!
Hi! Here’s the dumbest thing I’ve recently read on the I, Anonymous Blog—which is usually the home to the world’s greatest thinkers and rocket scientists. I got my shots. That doesn’t mean you have to. How are we going to let the political power whores in legislature decide what chemicals and viruses will be injected […]