As you certainly remember, Justin Bieber got a guest starring role on CSI: Crime Scene Investigation… why? BECAUSE THERE’S NOTHING THIS ADORABLE LITTLE MOP TOP CANNOT DO! Now… are you ready to see him ACT THE SHIT out of a CSI scene? Here’s Justin getting grilled by a cop who wants him to narc out […]
Bieber Fever
Posted inBieber Fever
Bieber Shows the 5-0 Who’s Really Boss
Infant pop star Justin Bieber explored the boundaries of his immunity to consequences, Sunday, by hitting a cop in the nuts with a water balloon. The act was both cute and subtly punk rock. As the story goes, the Maryland state trooper was struck in the groin by one of the water balloons Bieber was […]
Posted inBieber Fever
Oh, Fine. Caption This.
I feel like I have a lot of ground to make up after months of incessantly blogging about JUSTIN BIEBER, JUSTIN BIEBER, JUSTIN BIEBER, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!Therefore I invite you to go ahead and caption this photo. (Sigh.) Have fun.
Posted inCats
Cats Have No Fucking Taste
In this video a cat—FOR NO EARTHLY REASON—hates, and I mean really hates, Justin Bieber. What did he do? Run over your mom in his white Lamborghini? (Oh. He did? Hmm. Sorry.)
Posted inBieber Fever
A Justin Bieber Song You’ll Like—PROMISE!!
Okay, fine, I deserve some stick for continually torturing you people with my Justin Bieber obsession. HOWEVER! Here is a Justin Bieber song I GUARANTEE you will enjoy, and I’m not shitting you. What follows is Bieber’s very popular song “U Smile” slowed down 800 percent. And for reasons I can’t even begin to imagine, […]
Posted inBieber Fever
BREAKING: Bieber Mania Doesn’t Play So Well in Black Community
In a shocking development, certain members of the black community have discovered they are somehow immune to the charms of Justin Bieber. (Is it because he’s holding his nuts?) via
Posted inBieber Fever
Note to World: Don’t Fuck with Justin Bieber… Or Me for that Matter
I’ve stumbled upon a great way to deal with all the Justin Bieber haters on this blog—I’ll simply give Bieber your number and let him EXTRACT HIS SADISTIC AND DELICIOUS REVENGE. Over the weekend, Justin sent out this mysterious tweet (number redacted): Though the tweet was deleted minutes later, it encouraged at least 26,000 of […]
Posted inMovies & TV
Bieber Movie Moves Forward with a Director Who Doesn’t Think His Shit Smells Like Lemon Drops
Thanks to Bieber Believer and Merc film editor Erik Henriksen for this juicy bit of news:The Justin Bieber 3-D Biopic is moving forward and with a brand new—and non-snooty—director! As you may recall, the Justin movie was originally slated to be directed by Davis Guggenheim, who was behind the helm of Al Gore’s pet project […]
Posted inBieber Fever
Justin Bieber: The Animated Series of Saturday Morning Cartoon Animations!
No sooner was it announced that Justin Bieber is deservedly getting his own biographical 3D movie, a role on CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, and a royal designation as America’s newest “white Tupac,” now Justin gets his own animated cartoon, aptly entitled “The Justin Bieber Show”! Who’s your favorite character: the “Termite King” or the “Old […]
Posted inBieber Fever
It’s Official: Justin Bieber is the White Tupac!
Finally, our national nightmare is over. As you undoubtedly know, since his death in 1996, America has been looking for a “white Tupac” (apparently because there’s already been a black Tupac, and we’re not quite ready for a Mongolian Tupac). Thankfully, Mark “Marky Mark” Wahlberg has stepped up to solve this conundrum once and for […]
Posted inBieber Fever
BREAKING: Justin Bieber’s Got PIMPLES, Guys!
Okay, fine. Nothing is going to top this morning’s video featuring Justin Bieber getting doinked on the head by a water bottle. HOWEVER! It is extremely important for you to know that, along with getting a white Lamborghini from Puff Daddy for his birthday, Justin Bieber also gets paid for HAVING ZITS. Behold! A behind-the-scenes […]
Posted inBieber Fever
Justin Bieber Nailed by Water Bottle; Beginning of the End of Bieber Fever?
Yes, I love me some Justin Bieber—BUT! I also love it when Das Bieb runs into glass doors, makes failed escape attempts on Segways, and especially THIS VIDEO of Justin getting hilariously pelted on the noggin with a really big water bottle. Don’t worry, guys! He loves you even while you hate him. Just like […]