My last column was filed approximately five seconds before news broke that the Mueller report on the Trump campaign’s possible collusion with Russia was completed—which is great for me, because by the time I’ve filed this column, everybody’s already sick to death of hearing about it, so I don’t have to be bothered! All of […]
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This Too Shall Pass: Class Warfare, Here… We… Come!
Hiyeee! Happy Spring! It’s been idiotically pleasant in Portland lately, and I’ve been loving exposing my milky-white legs to our closest star. Of course, this is fake spring, and it for suresies will turn crappy again until late June, because it always does, but I think the rule should be that once it gets up […]
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This Too Shall Pass: A Rainbow Day in the Neighborhood
GABRIELLE TORELLO GRAND COMMUNICATIONS, FOX BROADCASTING Thank goodness for people who read biographies and write on the internet about the information they learned, because I never read biographies! A recent post on newnownext.com shared a passage from last year’s biography, The Good Neighbor: The Life and Work of Fred Rogers, by Maxwell King, revealing that […]
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This Too Shall Pass: Taylor Swift, Jared Kushner’s Nuts… and BUNNIES!
Ahoy-hoy! Let’s kick off the week with a game of “Would You Rather”: Would you rather see additional in-depth reporting on Jared Kushner’s financial dealings that truly and fully demonstrate his illegal behavior but you have to read the whole thing, including looking up terms and tax laws that you don’t understand, OR see an […]
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This Too Shall Pass: Miniature Horses and Speidi Crystals
Hi, everyone! I’m sincerely glad you’re taking time to read this biweekly documentation of one woman’s descent into madness. But we’re not dead… so that’s… something? Every day we’re not dead is one more middle finger to all those yahoos in charge. Hey, yahoos! We’re still here! Yes, “here” might be a large pillow fort […]
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This Too Shall Pass: Let’s Hear It for the Women!
Hello, and welcome back to This Too Shall Pass! Not that I didn’t think you’d come back, of course. I hope you’ll consider me the McRib of columns: sweet, salty, kinda gross, and yet whenever I reappear you’re like, “Okay, sure!” Oh man, did the last two weeks kick anyone else in the rear? Remember […]
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I Have Questions About Marky Mark’s Daily “To Do” List
Courtesy Mark Wahlberg’s Instagram According to BBC News, Mark “Marky Mark” Wahlberg recently hopped on Instagram to discuss his daily regimen with fans… AND IT IS FUCKED UP, FAMILY. As you can see from the pic below, Mark gets up at 2:30 in the morning, spends 30 minutes praying, has breakfast, a workout, and another […]
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One Day at a Time: Another Win for #TeamHeckle
McConnell retreats inside his shell. Getty Images WEDNESDAY, JULY 11 Here’s a nice bit of news: The creepy schemer behind Trump’s rigged Supreme Court, Senate Majority Turtle Mitch McConnell, got heckled out of a restaurant this week—for the “second time in two days,” reports Eater! In Louisville, “Protesters followed the senate majority leader to his […]
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One Day at a Time: #TeamHeckle
HECKLE ME, PLZ ALEX WONG/GETTY IMAGES FRIDAY, JULY 6 Speaking of attempts to drive the entire Trump administration out of town, public heckling of the president’s team of criminals is reaching an all-time high! Recently, spokeswoman Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Homeland Security’s Kirstjen Nielsen had very sad dining experiences thanks to some hilarious taunting from […]
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One Day at a Time
The GOP, Emperor Klaaktu, and Others Who Want to Destroy the Universe
The GOP, Emperor Klaaktu, and others who want to destroy the universe.
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One Day at a Time: No One Wants to Hire Trump Supporters (Boo-hoo-hoo!)
MARLOWE DOBBE THURSDAY, APRIL 12 It’s wrong to celebrate the failures of others… unless, of course, they’re Donald Trump supporters! According to Deadspin, an American boxer by the name of Rod Salka fought Mexican fighter Francisco Vargas tonight… and why should you care? Because Salka wore a pair of “America 1st” shorts, decorated to look […]
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One Day at a Time: Scott Pruitt—Super Criminal!
“Thumbs up for corruption!” CHIP SOMODEVILLA / GETTY IMAGES FRIDAY, APRIL 6 And the hits just keep on coming for embattled and clearly corrupt EPA Chief Scott Pruitt! As you recall, Scottie has been dinged in the press for his taxpayer-funded first-class flights, and renting a $50-a-night residence from the wife of an energy lobbyist […]