I’m a 25-year-old woman who has never been in a relationship. As a consequence, I’ve never kissed anyone and obviously never had sex. I'm not from a conservative family and sex has never been a taboo for me, however as a teenager I disliked my body and I’ve always been shy and introverted, and I felt awkward interacting with the opposite sex. At 22, when I finally felt ready to date, the pandemic started. Now, it has been three years and my life isn’t going the way I was expected it to when I was younger. I'm dealing with mental health issues, and I lost whatever confidence I had in my early 20s.

As I’m getting and feeling older, I’m anxious and desperate about this situation. Irrationally, I think that I'm the only 25-year-old in the world who's still a virgin and I'm extremely ashamed of this. I'm worried that I'm missing a lot of opportunities and that later on I’m going to regret this. At this point, I don’t mind the idea of meeting someone through a dating app and having disinterested sex (I'm not looking for a serious relationship), but I’m worried that my potential partner might notice that I’m completely inexperienced. At this point I feel like that I will never have the chance to be intimate with someone.

My questions:

1. Should I tell them?

2. Should I look for someone older and more sympathetic of my situation?

3. Are dating apps the only solution?

4. I generally feel more attracted to men once I get to know them. How long can I reasonably ask someone who is looking for something casual to wait?

5. Anything else I should know?

This Desperate Girl

My answers...

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