“What’s more loathsome than being Hitler’s girlfriend?” asks James St. James at the Wow Report. “Answer: Being Hitler’s girlfriend in blackface and drag!” From LIFE magazine’s newly published collection of Eva Braun’s Private Photos: Dear God.
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Posted inCrime
Criminal of The Week
If you haven’t caught the saga of Timothy James Chapeck, the young man who broke into a Portland house to take a shower on Monday night when the owner came home, and then ended up calling 911 from her bathroom because he was afraid she was going to shoot him, you should really take a […]
Posted inArtsy
Put a Weird on It: Soap
So I just got home from the Freddy’s on Hawthorne at SE 39th Ave. I bought a fifty pack of envelopes, ten mini bungee cords, a bottle of wine, and dishwasher soap. (Sidenote: who’s the MacGyver who can make a bong outta that stuff? I know you’re out there.) Anyway. I’m unpacking my horn of […]
Posted in?!?!?
FECES SMEARER=BUSTED
Remember this woman, mentioned in this post yesterday, after TriMet security cameras caught her SMEARING POOP ON A BUS DRIVER’S CHAIR? She was arrested last night. Apparently after a bunch of tips poured in from dozens of outraged people who know the woman, transit cops figured out who she was (18-year-old Gloria C. Soto of […]
Posted in?!?!?
Have You Seen McDonald’s Weird Website for Black People?
This is old, but it has just recently come to my attention so now I am bringing it to yours. Did you know that McDonald’s has a weird promotional website for black people? Here is its absurd description: Also, McDonalds has apparently successfully claimed ownership of this phrase:
Posted inPortland
Questioning Librarians
I said text your librarian, not sext. God, I love the Multnomah County Library. First you can download music from ’em. Now you can quiz the holy hell outta of ’em via text! Ask-a-librarian was an under-the-radar feature the library’s help desk always had via their reference line (503-988-5234), but it was kinda awkward having […]
Posted in?!?!?
Who Said It: Sheen or Gaddafi?
Both Charlie Sheen and Muammar Gaddafi gave insane, potentially drug-addled speeches this week. Vanity Fair has this hilarious quiz of quotes from the two crazies. Who said which?! Answers below the cut. 1. “Remember these are my people…not yours…we will continue on together…” 2. “…maybe they should let their women and their daughters go out.” […]
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What Portlandia Could Have Been…
…if Kyle MacLachlan ate Fred Armisen and Carrie Brownstein, scooted down to Southern California in a fat man’s golf cart, and then made special friends with the OctoMom. Good thing Portland’s not that, um, desperate. Right?
Posted in?!?!?
Leonard Nimoy’s Ballad of Bilbo Baggins
I heard this song on a podcast without description, thought it was amazing, and Googled the lyrics to find out who was responsible. My mind about cracked in half when Leonard Nimoy’s name came up—singing about Hobbits is far weirder than the man’s space poems or naked photos of large women. Behold:
Posted inFood and Drink
Today in Unnecessary and Vaguely Insulting Instructions
I’ll be the first to admit that I need all the help I can get when it comes to most things food-related. But the people who packaged this Kroger-brand sliced cheese (above) evidently think I am more of a moron than I actually am. On the flipside of the package are these helpful directions: I […]
Posted inSex
Good Morning, Questionable Sex Appeal
Let’s start out with the G-rated of the two hot/not topics buzzing around the internets this morning. First there’s the debate on Jennifer Aniston’s new hairdo: Mmhmm. Okay, now for something a little more attention grabbing and NSFW-ish, and… what the hell is that little kid doing in this video of Lady Gaga posing and […]
Posted in?!?!?
Redux: Ummm?!?
To prove that I’m not racist, I’d like to formally submit this potential billboard picture for your consideration/derision. Notice how white everyone is! Pistol-packing white bitches. That twat on the right is particularly obnoxious.